Sisterhood Done Right Is An Amazing Commodity
As part of the Her Best Books promotion, I’m writing a piece about women and sisterhood. I hope you enjoy what I’m going to share and then enter the giveaways at the bottom of the post!
In the literal sense, I have two sisters (I’m the middle child), whom I adore. While our relationships change and grow as we do, we were raised by loving, supportive parents and despite little things, we’ve maintained healthy relationships as adults.
When it comes to sisterhood of a different kind, my luck has been somewhat mixed.
I have had several female managers in my life and they all sucked. Actually, the best one was my manager for a nanosecond, but I thought she was great and we’re still in touch. I mean, I suppose they were good people (though in one case that’s questionable), but I think the dog-eat-dog world of corporate politics molded them to be uncaring drones.
An example: when I was a sales trainer for one of the largest pharma companies worldwide, a male manager made some sexually inappropriately comments to me. When I shared this uncomfortable situation with my manager, she told me I should be flattered cause ‘you’re so cute. Nobody ever makes comments like that to me!’ and advised me to drop it since ‘he’s a dad who supports his family.’
Another example: back out in the field as a multi-award-winning senior sales rep, a new female manager worked with me and said, at the end of a very long day, ‘I don’t get what the big deal is, why everyone loves you. You’re not that good.’ I’ve since learned (now that the company has been sued for gender harassment and lost) that this was just the first step in a campaign to oust women (particularly mothers, as I was) in order to replace us with young, single men.
I didn’t love the job but I was darn good at it. When all of my opportunities closed under her leadership, I quit – and never looked back.
As a working blogger and aspiring published author, I joined a few writers’ groups when my son was just a toddler. One group was great – we were honest with each other but supportive; the other not so much. One of the group leaders (a published author) told me my work was ‘unfit for publication.’ Which is fine – I’m a big girl. It hurt, of course, but I licked my wounds and kept writing.
However, a female friend who was part of the group (whom I admire greatly), took me aside and told me, ‘Don’t listen to her. You’re an amazing writer and your work makes me cry.’ I’ll be forever grateful to both of them. Why both? It was such a valuable learning experience in so many ways: as a woman, as a writer, and as a human.
I’ve now had three successful, bestselling books on Kindle (A Walk In The Snark, Mancode: Exposed, and now Broken Pieces), and hope my next books do as well. I started a business to help other authors market their work and it’s booming. But most importantly, I’ve developed amazing relationships (working and real-life) with unbelievable women: my editor, proofreader and formatter, my graphic artists, my web designer, site owners, reviewers, blog tour operators, several mentors, and of course, other authors and readers.
I’ve met amazing people through social media – both men and women – and I couldn’t be more grateful. This isn’t a slam on guys. It’s not a slam on anyone. It’s just an example that surrounding myself with amazing women creates such a wonderful feeling of sisterhood I’m grateful to experience.
Beyond that, in writing Broken Pieces, I’ve experienced an incredible bond with total strangers – both men and women — over something none of us would ever choose to experience but have had to deal with: sexual abuse or assault. The stories are heartbreaking, but what amazes me is the strength the majority of women have to move beyond these incidences and create a life.
Truly a sisterhood of a different kind.
And that’s what this piece is about today. Learning and growing with other women who work together toward a common goal: to create the best life, and work, possible.
I’m thrilled to be part of this book promotion group because each of these authors writes stories for and about women, are successful bestsellers, are whip smart, generous, and each is just so freakin’ nice. We’re offering an iPad Mini, gift baskets or gift cards, and our books are either all discounted or free during this next week (April 28 through May 2)!
I’ve learned that sisterhood doesn’t suck. Sisterhood done right is one of the few gifts women have that men rarely experience. Sure, men bond easily over sports and stuff. But I’ve met very few women reticent to share a personal experience with another woman. It’s how we bond.
And for that, I’m glad and honored to be part of the sisterhood.
BROKEN PIECES WILL BE FREE ON SUNDAY, 4/28 AND MONDAY, 4/29 ONLY! Please check it out and download a copy from Amazon (reminder: no Kindle is required to download eBooks. Download their free apps for smartphone, computer, or tablet. Be sure to enter the iPad Mini contest, too and share with your friends!
For me, leave me a comment about the “sisters” in your life and I’ll giveaway an Amazon Gift Card to a random commenter.
Steena Holmes bestselling author of Finding Emma is giving away a chocolate gift basket to someone who leaves a comment about their fairy godmother
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Christine Nolfi, award winning author of Treasure Me is giving away a gift basket of Charleston treats as her giveaway
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Patricia Sands, bestselling author of the hot new release, The Promise of Provence is giving away a beautiful book on the Most Beautiful Country Towns of Provence from Amazon to a lucky commenter.
* * *
Karla Darcy, bestselling author of 7 Regency Romances including The Divided Hearts is giving away an Amazon Gift Card to a lucky person
* * *
Bette Lee Crosby, ten-time award-winning author of Spare Change is giving away an Amazon Gift Card for answering a question.
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To keep up to date with new releases and new giveaways coming this summer, visit out blog, Her Best Books, and be sure to subscribe to our newsletter.
Janie Junebug saysApril 27, 2013 at 9:47 pm
I haven’t had much success with sisterhood. My biological sisters hate me. I’ve worked with women who tolerated me, and women who were openly hostile to me. But I have some amazing sister friends.
RachelintheOC saysApril 27, 2013 at 10:53 pm
As long as you have your amazing sister friends, you are part of the sisterhood community, Janie!
Can’t pick your family, etc.
Thanks for reading and commenting, luv.
Karla Darcy saysApril 27, 2013 at 9:54 pm
I’ve been blessed with a sister that the whole family refers to as the good sister. And she is. I know I can count on her to help in a moment’s notice. And now in this pressure cooker we call self publishing I’ve found some amazing sisters who have generously shared the triumphs and the failures and encouraged me when my faith was flagging. For those who haven’t been this lucky, keep looking and you’ll find some great friends in the sisterhood.
RachelintheOC saysApril 27, 2013 at 10:53 pm
It’s wonderful to know there are people in this world who have our backs — whether they are men or women.
I do love how easily women bond — it’s one of the great wonders of nature that makes up (slightly) for having periods.
Rachel Thompson (@BadRedheadMedia) saysApril 27, 2013 at 9:55 pm
Want to win an #iPadMini, prizes, free books? Read Sisterhood Done Right Is An Amazing Commodity: http://t.co/hAAAB6yKGc
Ardee Eichelmann saysApril 28, 2013 at 12:20 am
I have long believed that sisterhood is indeed powerful. I went to an all girls Catholic High school. The bonds formed have been long lived. We learned that boys come and go but sisterhood is forever. It is a valuable lesson. 😉
Denise Zaky (@ZDz59001) saysApril 28, 2013 at 1:23 am
6 bestselling authors, 60 #free books + #iPad Mini #giveaway http://t.co/5KDsDdoUMv #HerBooks http://t.co/e764K808lt
Denise Z saysApril 28, 2013 at 1:32 am
I worked for many years in the big corp and I really do think they put something in the coffee that breeds bitchy LOL Now I am self-employed and have found authors, blogs, FB, and twitter with some of the most amazing and fun group of folks anyone could ask for. Of course we all have our days, but overall I can always find something that will make me smile, which to me is a really big deal 🙂 Thanks for being part of that.
RachelintheOC saysApril 28, 2013 at 8:57 am
Thanks for sharing, Denise.
I love your coffee comment! It’s funny — I worked with some wonderful women when I was in the pharma home office, but for some reason, my female managers were awful. Really sad. It’s not a good testament to sisterhood, that’s for sure.
And with the exception of a few, yes, I totally agree. The writing community is amazingly supportive, whether men OR women. But it’s wonderful to build up our support system, as women, with women.
The Masquerade Crew (@MasqCrew) saysApril 28, 2013 at 2:26 am
Sisterhood Done Right Is An Amazing Commodity http://t.co/wXSnHVB3T0 via @RachelintheOC
Nadene Reynolds saysApril 28, 2013 at 4:18 am
I am not close to my biological sisters as we never grew up together in light of the fact that the only thing in common we had were that we shared the same father. However I have been blessed with a great friend whom is like a sister to me in every sense of the word.
RachelintheOC saysApril 28, 2013 at 8:58 am
Isn’t that awesome? I’m so happy for you.
Friends are critical — I didn’t mention friends in the piece, but my two best friends have both been in my life for 25-30 years. Having women as our support system is crucial, IMHO.
hugs to you, Nadene!
Malia Mallory (@MaliaMallory) saysApril 28, 2013 at 4:30 am
Sisterhood Done Right Is An Amazing Commodity http://t.co/65tFuEp4zO via @RachelintheOC
The Mommy saysApril 28, 2013 at 6:00 am
I have one sister and we’re not very sisterly (she’s 10 years my junior so that makes a difference) and I’ve truly struggled with finding my own “sisterhood”. I have fantastic sister-friends that I’ve had for 20-30+ years but I’ve had a hard time making new friends who are part of the season of life I’m in now. Sigh. I’ll keep trying. Of course, most of the time I just think it *must* be me…stay-at-home motherhood can be very isolating at times. Sometimes, I’m just so thankful for the virtual world.
RachelintheOC saysApril 28, 2013 at 9:00 am
Totally agree with you, honey. That’s why I started my blog back in 2008 — for my sanity LOL.
What’s great about the virtual world is how many wonderful people I’ve met IRL as well. One of my newest best friends is a wonderful male writer — he and his husband have invited me to visit them and I can’t wait to take them up on it.
It will happen — just give it time. xo
Dionne Lister (@DionneLister) saysApril 28, 2013 at 6:45 am
Sisterhood Done Right Is An Amazing Commodity http://t.co/MLaFZk0H9v via @RachelintheOC
Renee A. Schuls-Jacobson saysApril 28, 2013 at 6:50 am
Oh, I’m so glad you deconstructed. I only have one brother.
I have many sisters.
I’ve been fortunate to have some very old friends with whom I have known since elementary school. But my bestie? She is truly my sister. We CHOSE each other. I can call her any time of day or night. Same goes for her. The other day, she needed to talk. We never made it out of her driveway. Two hours in the car, talking. We working something out. It was a complicated something. With sisters who really do it right, there is understanding and honesty. And forgiveness. They want you to be your best self and you want to lift them up, too. We support each other, but we are also each other’s crutches when we need each other. I always wanted a sister, and I’m so glad that I found one in my best friend.
RachelintheOC saysApril 28, 2013 at 9:02 am
How amazing that you can depend on each other like that. Sometimes your friends are more there for you than your family.
Friendship amazes me. We can bond with people for life, or just for periods of time. Why is that? I guess we needed them, and they us, and that’s what drew us together.
Thrilled you have that, Renee.
Jackie Lane saysApril 28, 2013 at 6:55 am
I don’t have a sister, only a brother (who is awesome, by the way), but I do have some friends that I wish were sisters. I do believe you have hit the nail on the head with your tales. The female friends that I have are strong, independent women that would never say a harsh thing to you. They will give you honest answers and not stab you in the back and drop everything to help you and vice versa. Anyone lucky enough to find this through the biological sister or friends, is lucky.
Gail johnston saysApril 28, 2013 at 7:11 am
I definitely think sisterhood is wonderful. I don’t have sisters myself but have cousins I grew up with so have those family memories plus have good friends from all stages and places in my life. It’s all about girlfriends: the ones who love you and you can love right back; the ones who have your back and you have their’s!
Patricia Sands saysApril 28, 2013 at 7:31 am
True and honest sisterhood is a powerful force, Rachel. I’m so honoured and pleased to be part of this group with you.
Lisa McFerren (@Lisas_alter_ego) saysApril 28, 2013 at 7:45 am
Sisterhood Done Right Is An Amazing Commodity http://t.co/Zh4UIZWhNl via @RachelintheOC
Stella (Ex Libris) saysApril 28, 2013 at 7:57 am
I have two younger sisters, and despite my little sister being 7 years my junior we share a special bond. I love her with the love of a sister, mother and best friend and she trusts me like noone else. Besides my blodd sisters I have two best friends with whom I’ve been close for more than 15 years now. We grew up together and still can talk the hours away without tiring out any subject 😀
Kathleen Valentine saysApril 28, 2013 at 8:11 am
As the eldest of five sisters I’ve been a sister most of my life. Your words hit home in so many ways.
Janice Hougland saysApril 28, 2013 at 8:23 am
I have been privileged to have had wonderful “sisters” in my life…all along the way, no matter where I’ve been (and I’ve moved a lot). I had some wonderful teachers, who are now gone, but who taught me much more than the subject matter we were studying; I had a wonderful grandmother who taught me that love is the most important thing in life, that no matter the circumstance life does go on and we need to make the best of it; I do have a sibling sister who has taught me a lot about selflessness and forgiveness and how those two things can empower you; during my active years as a pastor’s wife I’ve had many sisters-of-the-heart, but one in particular who I still correspond with today; and I have a very dear sister-of-the-heart who is a neighbor and who has taught me much about community and pulling together to “get things done and enjoy the getting things done.” I believe in sisterhood, most definitely.
Sandra Spilecki saysApril 28, 2013 at 8:23 am
My only sister helped make my wedding and not an elopement. Since then she has hurt me deeply several times. We no longer speak.
Debbie Vega saysApril 28, 2013 at 8:29 am
When I first started writing, I decided to join RWA (Romance Writers of America). The published members were so kind, open, supportive and willing to mentor those who were unpublished.
The romance genre is not my cup of tea, but that didn’t matter to my co-members. They embraced members from various genres (and were happy to welcome male writers who were brave enough to join).
Now that I live in a city without an RWA chapter, I miss that feeling of sisterhood! I would totally join again if one opened in my area or if I moved to a city that had one.
Gail Johnston saysApril 28, 2013 at 8:46 am
I was not blessed with a sister; however, I do have wonderful female cousins and good friends who are like sisters to me. Sisters, whether blood-related or “chosen”, are so important in every woman’s life. Friendship is all about sisterhood for me and every friendship is worth holding on to. Thanks.
Jess Witkins saysApril 28, 2013 at 9:44 am
Hi! Popped over from Patricia Sands’ blog today and I must say I greatly identified with your stories. I worked 6 years in Retail, most of them in management, and the women I worked with like District Merchants and Store Managers were all pretty cut-throat and wouldn’t hesitate to throw someone below them under the bus if it made them look good. I recently quit because like you, under a new female manager, I felt I had no clear direction or opportunities at work. Plus it got back to me that she was sharing private information about me to her boyfriend who spilled his guts to another male coworker of mine over drinks. Just lovely. I made sure to report it in my exit interview, but doubt it’ll do much good.
As to my “sisters”, the best ones are those that act as mentors. I thankfully started with a great manager that saw a lot of potential in me and that made me rise to the occasion. In turn, I loved giving that kind of mentoring back, and in my last year with the company, saw several of my team members elevate to higher sales positions and even leadership roles because of coaching I’d done with them. I think a sister is someone who isn’t intimidated by the success of her other sisters, but rather helps them and cheers them on.
RachelintheOC saysApril 28, 2013 at 11:18 am
Thanks so much for sharing and I couldn’t agree more!
I’m sorry for your tough experiences. Looking back on mine (I quit pharma in 2004), it truly was a gift. While it created great angst at the time, I finally had no excuse NOT to pursue my writing career.
Sure, money is always a worry (and having health insurance, a car, bonuses, and paid vacation was lovely) but those are really just false promises. I created all those things for myself with my writing and my business. Having mentors is huge — something I didn’t allow myself until I’d been through all of that mess.
Good for you for giving back to others — it’s wonderful how great it feels to see people thrive!
Justin Bogdanovitch (@JustinBog) saysApril 28, 2013 at 9:51 am
Sisterhood Done Right Is An Amazing Commodity http://t.co/f6WcEw6AwX via @RachelintheOC
Dana Leal saysApril 28, 2013 at 10:20 am
Spiritually I have many sisters in my faith, who are diverse and wonderful women. All from different walks. They build and support. Are always encouraging. I cannot say they will never disappoint me, but intentionally I know they’d never do anything to harm me. I am more than thankful for their love patience and acceptance! Sisterhood is amazing when you’re within the right circles.
RachelintheOC saysApril 28, 2013 at 11:18 am
So true, Dana. Thanks for sharing and lots of hugs.
Christine Nolfi saysApril 28, 2013 at 10:20 am
Rachel, when I think of “sisters” you always come to mind. Readers of your blog and your dizzying number of followers on social media may never look past your witty and sometimes hilariously snarky comments. But I do. You’re one of the most smartest, most supportive, and most decent writers working today. You work like a dog but manage to remain upbeat and generous. You never walk over anyone to get ahead. Babe, you’re honorable to the bone and a damn fine author. Write on.
RachelintheOC saysApril 28, 2013 at 11:19 am
oh damn, now you’re making me cry.
Thanks, sweet Christine. And back at ya!
Christine Nolfi (@christinenolfi) saysApril 28, 2013 at 10:22 am
Sisterhood Done Right? @RachelintheOC has an essay you won’t want to miss. http://t.co/rAYI3fW0sa #HerBooks
Tina M saysApril 28, 2013 at 10:51 am
I have 3 older sisters and 1 younger. We had our good days and bad days. We still are there for each other no matter what happens or happened in our busy lives..
bn100 saysApril 28, 2013 at 11:45 am
A good friend who’s always there anytime no matter what
bn100candg at hotmail dot com
RachelintheOC saysApril 28, 2013 at 6:54 pm
that’s the best kind of friend 🙂 thx for participating.
Sara saysApril 28, 2013 at 1:04 pm
I have been lucky! I have 2 older sisters. One is my BFF. there is about 7 years between us and while living at home she would do my make-up and hair and she would take me on silly car rides looking for the boy she loved (and once getting chase by him!) She moved to Oregon and I came to stay with her a few years! best time ever! I married and she moved back to Idaho to help with my mom. Sometimes when I make the trip to Idaho she will fly in and we drive back together! I miss her everyday! We talk to text at least everyday! Then I have my “adopted” sister. She is also my BFF. I met her 9 years ago and we have been friends ever since. She hasn’t been so lucky in the family department. so one year my sister and I printed out an adoption form filled it out and had my parents sign it (they love her too) and we framed it and gave it to her as a b-day gift. She is our sister and always will be.
RachelintheOC saysApril 28, 2013 at 5:51 pm
That’s such a beautiful story, Sara, about adopting your friend. How wonderful for her AND you and your family. Thanks for sharing!
Patricia Yager Delagrange saysApril 28, 2013 at 1:36 pm
Sisters? I have five of which I am close to two of them. They’re my best buddies. Someone asked me the other day who my friends were and I said my two sisters. Just because they’re sisters doesn’t mean they can’t be my BFF’s, right? And my other special friends live far away from me, but as I read on Patricia Sands’ blog, it’s not important that you talk all the time and see each other frequently, but that when you do talk, it’s as if no time has passed.
RachelintheOC saysApril 28, 2013 at 6:55 pm
That’s so great. I feel like that with my two best girlfriends as well as my sisters.
Sisterhood is a powerful force, no question. xo
Stephen Woodfin (@stephenwoodfin) saysApril 28, 2013 at 1:43 pm
Sisterhood Done Right Is An Amazing Commodity http://t.co/dMeQRgOL21 via @RachelintheOC
Andrea Corley saysApril 28, 2013 at 2:02 pm
I was given one sister by birth, and have two close sisters that I’ve had every since, well once since birth, and the other since Kindergarten. It doesn’t matter what the problem, they are always there for me no matter what the cost, as I will always be for them! I have also found such a great sisterhood in a book club group on Goodreads that have truly become a new lifeline for me here recently!
RachelintheOC saysApril 28, 2013 at 6:56 pm
Lifelong friends are such a wonderful gift! Nobody knows me like my best friends or sisters. These are relationships I cherish. So glad you have that too! xo
Judy saysApril 28, 2013 at 3:06 pm
I have no blood sisters, but I have a wonderful sisterhood that I have established over many years. Some are from my childhood and some I have only known a few years. I am true to my friends and to myself and have friendships with the people who are positive influences in my life.
Cindy Brown (@hiyacynthia) saysApril 28, 2013 at 3:10 pm
6 bestselling authors, 60 #free books + #iPad Mini #giveaway http://t.co/ScEuIWgECw #HerBooks http://t.co/w5PE4Zrn4L
Cindy Brown saysApril 28, 2013 at 3:16 pm
Sisters are often best when they’re not related. I’ve had many friends, both online and in real life, who were closer than my blood sisters. Families are too fractured these days, plus I did not grow up with my sisters (one was a half sister ten years older and the other was a half sister who lived with my father, ten years younger). I have had a closer relationship with my sisterhood friends and I’m totally okay with that.
Angelina saysApril 28, 2013 at 3:24 pm
Unfortunately I did/do not have sisters. I had one brother. But I have joined a group of almost 1,000 women of all ages, races, religions, locations and have one thing in common we are all married, yet we have disagreements, conversations, give advice when needed and support when going through a tough time. We all have come to love one another and understand that we are all different but that is ok. We have learned how to agree to disagree. I am thankful for this diverse group of women as we have learned much from each other and continue to grow.
Catherine Lemanski saysApril 28, 2013 at 3:37 pm
I enjoyed your article about Sisterhood. It brought to mind my blood sister and my sister in friendship, whom I haven’t talked to in a while. That doesn’t matter because when I do see them or talk to them on the phone, it is like we just talked the day before, nothing has changed, we can talk about anything with each other. It makes for wonderful, supportive relationships that help me as a person grow.
KarenM saysApril 28, 2013 at 3:44 pm
I find women to be much more supportive in life. I have a wonderful blood sister, and many female friends. Thanks for focusing on the good sisters and not requiring facebook to enter your contest.
Darci paicebailey saysApril 28, 2013 at 3:58 pm
I don’t have a biological sister but do have a BFF who fills that role in my life, she is there for me, my children and my pets at a moments notice and shares her life with us. I can’t imagine her not being in my life, the joy and friendship she brings is an absolute delight.
Doreen saysApril 28, 2013 at 3:59 pm
I love my sister. She is my best friend. She is getting married this fall, and I am honored and excited to be a bridesmaid in her wedding.
Deborah Murrill Blanchard saysApril 28, 2013 at 4:01 pm
I am the oldest of 12 children, I am the proud owner of 5 sisters, whom I love and adore. we don’t always get along, but I have the very BEST SISTER in my best friend Becky. I can always count on her and she on me. Sisterhood is more than just family, its 2 who become as 1 in life.
Raine Thomas (@Raine_Thomas) saysApril 28, 2013 at 4:09 pm
Sisterhood Done Right Is An Amazing Commodity http://t.co/beKIsi4SFI via @RachelintheOC
Lexie C saysApril 28, 2013 at 4:41 pm
I am an only so no bio sisters for me but I have found some truly amazing sisters in my trek through the blogosphere! Though I only know most of them through email and blogging, I feel supported and enriched by their friendship and sisterhood.
I have 3 daughters of my own- all 3 different as could be and they bicker and fight but I know they have something special and I hope that they stay connected and close throughout their lives.
Rita Wray saysApril 28, 2013 at 4:51 pm
I’m also a middle sister. My younger sister lives in Australia and my older sister lives in Idaho. I wish they were closer, sure would be nice to chat over a cup of coffee.
Mary Roya saysApril 28, 2013 at 4:52 pm
I agree with Cindy, sisters are often best when they are not related. But I won’t trade the relationship with my sister for anything. My sister and I talk and text often. Thanks [email protected]
Barrie saysApril 28, 2013 at 4:55 pm
The sisters in my life are family: two SILs and my stepsister. Without them as a support system or sounding board, I don’t know where I’d be…more crazy than I already am, I guess:)
Andrea Minier saysApril 28, 2013 at 5:08 pm
I am an only child. I wish I wasn’t, but not my call. I do however have a BFF who is more than a sister to me. We share everything, we have had our children almost at the same time (weeks apart). I never lost a child, but she did and it felt like part of me was lost also. So I may never had the privalidge to fight with my own sisters, I have a great friend who should be my blood relative.
Dean Young saysApril 28, 2013 at 5:14 pm
Sisters of the heart are amazingly better than sisters of the blood.
Marjorie McAtee (@marjoriemcatee) saysApril 28, 2013 at 5:33 pm
Sisterhood Done Right Is An Amazing Commodity http://t.co/MV5GB3EWhC via @RachelintheOC
wanda saysApril 28, 2013 at 6:20 pm
I have both biological sisters and sisters of the heart that I am close to we all know if one of us needs the other just call and we are there .
Dawn Doyle saysApril 28, 2013 at 6:21 pm
I hit the Sisters JACKPOT! I have 4 biological sisters that rock!, I have my GG Sisters that mean the world to me, and my many many “social media” sisters that have helped me through all kinds of “down in the dumps” time. I consider me a very lucky girl!
Mary Preston saysApril 28, 2013 at 6:25 pm
I have 5 sisters – and one brother, the youngest.
It’s like having a whole group of best friends.
Ciara Ballintyne (@CiaraBallintyne) saysApril 28, 2013 at 6:38 pm
Sisterhood Done Right Is An Amazing Commodity http://t.co/rNBgFxRFZm via @RachelintheOC
SHELLEY S saysApril 28, 2013 at 7:12 pm
YES I HAVE A SISTER AND WE SEE EACH OTHER ALOT. [email protected]
@Lmoore43 saysApril 28, 2013 at 7:34 pm
6 bestselling authors, 60 #free books + #iPad Mini #giveaway http://t.co/CniNLTHFP0 #HerBooks http://t.co/Ur7uASOdK1
Bessamy saysApril 28, 2013 at 7:42 pm
I was not blessed with a sister. The only sister I found through the years was a wonderful woman I went to college with. We have stayed in touch through the years by writing and then Facebook. Facebook has definately made it easier to find out what each other is up to. Thank you for the chance to share and be part of this effort!
RachelintheOC saysApril 29, 2013 at 8:40 am
How lovely that you have that type of friendship! Social media has definitely made life easier with regard to staying in touch.
jennifer mathis saysApril 28, 2013 at 7:45 pm
i have friends i think of as sisters but my true sister is a bit of a backstabber
RachelintheOC saysApril 28, 2013 at 7:55 pm
Friends are truly amazing sisters, no doubt.
Sorry about your bio sister (that’s what one of my friends calls her sister whom she’s not close to). Can’t choose our family but we certainly can choose our friends.
Lynn Rettig saysApril 28, 2013 at 8:33 pm
I have no blood sisters, but given the relationship between my biological male sibling and myself, that may be a good thing. However, I do have three fantastic Herze Schwestern, courtesy of my fairy Godparents (not really Godparents, but still …), who over the last 8 – 10 years have replaced my birth parents, both emotionally and physically (technically, I have been an orphan the last three years, since the death of my father). And what a bargain those three ladies are! I also got, along with them, three great brothers-in-law (one of whom is one of this year’s 10 Best New Chefs for Food & Wine magazine!! Go, Jason!) (sorry, I just had to boast on him!!), and at last count 3 nieces, and 4 nephews. AND I haven’t had to change a single diaper to get them! Now THAT’S the way to have kids!!
RachelintheOC saysApril 28, 2013 at 9:23 pm
Thanks for sharing. Families can be a rough road, no question.
I’m so happy you have important people close to you now in your life. That’s what counts.
and so exciting about your BIL chef! That’s so exciting.
Linda Rorex saysApril 28, 2013 at 8:38 pm
I am 10 years older than my sister and she bossed me around then and she still bosses me around but we have a better relationship now.
RachelintheOC saysApril 28, 2013 at 9:29 pm
I too have a sister 10 years younger than I and she was like my live doll. As we grew older, she got the bossy gene too (not that I didn’t/don’t have it!) but we’ve managed to navigate those waters as we’ve grown older and had our own children.
Linda S Moore saysApril 28, 2013 at 8:46 pm
My sister and I are the best of friends. We had a bad home life but our Aunt took my little sister when she was barely 3 and raised her to be a wonderful women who I am so proud of. I was glad that she was away from our mother who for some reason did not like girls. I was fortunate enough to have a sort of foster mom for several years that made me the person that I am today and I am very proud of the woman I am. My sister and I were together all the time growing up and we married brothers so her son and my daughter have a brother/sister bloodline and are very close also. I love my sister with all my heart and would do anything for her as she would for me too. We never looked back at our mother once we were grown and I finally got away from her for good. To me there is nothing better than a sister, if you have one as terrific as mine that is. I love her with all my heart…. 🙂
Thank you for sharing with us all. I enjoyed reading your story.
RachelintheOC saysApril 28, 2013 at 9:27 pm
Thank YOU for sharing. It’s amazing how horrible some people can be toward their own children, and how wonderful others can be — our capacity for love is boundless. I’m so happy you had wonderful women in your life. It’s so important us — no matter our age.
Kai W. saysApril 28, 2013 at 9:46 pm
I don’t have a very good relationship with my biological sisters. One of them hates me while the other three ignore me. My close friends are more of a sister to me fortunately.
RachelintheOC saysApril 29, 2013 at 8:42 am
that’s no fun, Kai 🙁 but it’s lovely to have such wonderful close friends!
When I got married, I had a very small wedding (50 people total) and only a maid of honor. I have two sisters. So…I chose my best friend since grade school LOL! Looking back, I probably would have picked all three and just had them squish together :). But no regrets — J is still my best friend, over 20 years later.
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Tom Stronach saysApril 29, 2013 at 1:04 am
I’ve got a wife, two daughters and 4 grand daughters; sisterhood is them all ganging up on me, it’s pretty cool really
Good piece, keep being honest, sweets, oops hope that wasn’t too sexist xx
RachelintheOC saysApril 29, 2013 at 8:44 am
LOL, not at all, Tom. You’re awesome and I adore you.
Estrogen rocks. My dad often felt the same way, with a wife, three daughters, and two female grandchildren. Finally, I had the first boy and to be honest, they don’t know quite what to do with him! He’s an energetic puppy and they’re not quite used to that. But of course, they love him so much. Good thing he’s so damn cute. 🙂
xo and hugs to your fabulous wife.
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Dawn saysApril 29, 2013 at 7:09 am
I have one sister five years my senior. Despite the age difference we were pretty close and now as adults are closer still. She has been a huge blessing in my life and I thank her for paving the way. I’ve watched her through her teen years, in marriage, as a parent and basically navigate life and her example has made my own journey far less bumpy. There are many other women I have chosen to be my sisters but none will replace her. Even living two continents away, we keep touch and share our lives. God was good to me when He gifted me with her.
Deborah Murrill Blanchard saysApril 29, 2013 at 8:19 am
I downloaded broken pieces yesterday and I can’t wait to read it. I always thought that I was broken somehow. I was married to an abusive man, no longer. I was a victim of gang rape, no longer a victim. I have survived many things that “broke” me, but I have “survived”. It made me so much stronger of a person, more compassionite, more loving, I don’t know how , but somehow all the broken pieces came together and made me strong. It took a very long time to learn to love me, to trust me, to trust someone else, but know I know I can and I do. They took my spirit for a little while, well a long while, but now I have it back, and it is stronger than ever. It takes a lot of broken pieces to make a whole, maybe that’s how it’s supposed to be.
Jenny Martin saysApril 29, 2013 at 8:26 am
I have a brother–and he is the best a girl can have…but when I need sisters–I turn to my cousins–who grew up with me–they are the sisters I did not have!
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celina k saysApril 29, 2013 at 8:54 am
My actual sister is amazing, I don’t know what my life would be without her. As for the workplace, that is entirely a different story. Why do women hate each other so much? As a female manager, I would say in an instant I would rather have all male employees-but that would be counterproductive to the issue at hand, wouldn’t it? It’s just so much easier! I have always had an easier time getting along with males – the cattiness, drama, rumors, gossip and jealousy (I could go on!) of working with females in my field is just too much for me. I just don’t understand it!
Anyways..to end this on a positive note..I love my sister. 🙂
RachelintheOC saysApril 29, 2013 at 10:20 am
I totally get it, Celina (beautiful name BTW).
I’ve never wanted to manage people and that’s part of what I love about writing. It’s just me. That said, I’ve been in some writer’s groups (as I discuss in the article) where the women are lovely and amazing, or are critical and sometimes downright cruel.
As you say, it can be awful. I do think the workplace can breed that type of cattiness and shows like ‘Real Housewives’ don’t help dispel those behaviors. It’s worth another post, I’m thinking!
xoxo and yay to having a wonderful sister!
Theresa Hurley saysApril 29, 2013 at 10:09 am
My only sister and I are almost five years apart. It’s only recently that we’ve grown close and I’ve felt like I have a sister again. She lives three hours away, but she came as soon as she heard that my son died, came for the funeral, for the auction of his belongings, and came yesterday for a Mother Daughter Tea at Mom’s church-about a five hour trip from her new home for a two hour tea. It’s good to have her back.
RachelintheOC saysApril 29, 2013 at 10:21 am
Oh honey — my heart breaks for you. I can’t imagine losing a child. 🙁
Thanks goodness you have a supportive family. They know you like nobody else. Best of luck moving on — lots of love and support here as well.
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Shannon saysApril 29, 2013 at 12:15 pm
Sadly my sister and I have really grown apart and I do miss the close both we had. I will soon be moving close to her again and hope that will help spur us back towards the relationship we once had
Shaila saysApril 29, 2013 at 1:11 pm
Well I have 3 sisters, and no matter how much they irritate me, they all have contributed to my life in someway or the other. My oldest sister has always provided for me, and filled the void , my parents couldn’t fill. My second sister has always been there for love advice, since she has a lot of experience, lol! And my third sister always backed me up and tried to see my view of things.
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sherry fundin saysApril 29, 2013 at 3:53 pm
My youngest sister and I are very close. I get along with my whole family and have found how important they are the older I get.
Linda Foust saysApril 29, 2013 at 4:22 pm
I have one sister, lives 40 miles from me and we’ve never been close. But, I have found my sisters in Don’s three sisters. All 3 are loving, caring and treat me as a blood sister. The other is my cousin. We’re closers than a lot of sisters, share everything and when we talk on the phone, it’s usually at least an hour call. As for the working world, I never had luck there. I worked at our hospital and it seemed everyone put in their 8 hrs. and didn’t go out of their way for anyone. I made friends with the patients, held their hands, and talked with their family members and I feel that attitude drove a lot of co workers away from me.
RachelintheOC saysApril 29, 2013 at 10:59 pm
My mother worked in a hospital for years, also (as an x-ray tech). She found a wonderful mentor in one of the female doctors there, but the rest of the stress and pressure of the hospital setting wore her down.
She ended up in small radiology office and though the doctor was an ass, the ‘girls’ (as she called them) who worked there became life-long friends. Every workplace is different, of course, but my experience has been that the larger the workplace, the more difficult it is to be ourselves. Perhaps that makes it doubly hard for women. I still haven’t figured that out yet. 😉
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Vicki saysApril 29, 2013 at 6:00 pm
I only have a brother as a sibling, but I have a lot of sister’s in my sisterhood. Sister-in laws, my Mom, cousins, school friends I remain in contact with, extended female family, aunts, ex-coworkers from various jobs in my life, neighbors, and many social media sisters.
Bette Lee Crosby saysApril 29, 2013 at 6:08 pm
This was a such a great look back at life and the female in business experience. I started out laughing because I’ve been there and know what you say is all too often true…but I ended up sighing because what you said about the sisterhood of friends is also true. You have a wonderful way of peeling back the layers of life and reaching into the heart of it. All of the accolades are justly deserved.
RachelintheOC saysApril 29, 2013 at 10:56 pm
Thank you, Bette! you’re too kind. *blush*
Corporate life was no picnic, but it did teach me a lot about people. I’m glad you could relate to it. And I loved your post about strong woman! Brava 😉
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Mel K. saysMay 1, 2013 at 8:39 am
I have a biological sister. And I have several sisters who are authors. I don’t know what I’d do without them.
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Janie McGaugh saysMay 1, 2013 at 5:33 pm
I don’t have any biological sisters. The other “sisters” in my life have come and gone over the years.
RachelintheOC saysMay 1, 2013 at 6:14 pm
It’s sad when they go, but sometimes it’s just what has to happen. I understand completely. Been there.
Roni Lynne saysMay 1, 2013 at 5:50 pm
I don’t have any biological sisters, but I did sort of adopt the 2 younger sisters of a guy I dated in undergrad. They’ve always lived in different cities, but we’ve stayed close through letters (back in the day) & now computer/phones. I also have sister friends who I know have my back when the chips are down.
Crystal Woodmancy saysMay 1, 2013 at 6:26 pm
I don’t have any sisters, but being an ARMY wife, you have to be able to make friends quickly. These gals become your family, and essentially your sisters. You know they are that when you don’t even have to ask for help, its just there!
RachelintheOC saysMay 1, 2013 at 6:28 pm
Isn’t that wonderful? I’m so glad you have that. Particularly with the internet, even moving, y’all can stay in touch.
Thanks for sharing an important sisterhood!
Pat Clark saysMay 1, 2013 at 6:39 pm
Like you, I’m the middle child of 3 girls. Being the middle child teaches us how to negotiate and make (or get) comprises. I was also the instigator of the bunch since I knew how to get both of them to do what I wanted…..still works destructiveay. :-).
I have worked for over 35 years and while I’ve had one female boss that I dearly loved out of 4, I much prefer having a male supervisor. There is less emphasis on what you’re wearing, hairstyles, etc. Men do gossip but they are not as destructive as women. Also, they are easy to distract and will buy the helpless routine no
matter how many times they seen you do something like lift 25 lb bags, they will pick up a computer for you.
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Sarah Negovetich saysMay 1, 2013 at 10:02 pm
Reading some of these comments, I think I’m a lucky lady. I have three sisters who are all amazing people in their own way. I was lucky to find an diverse and accepting sorority in college and I’m still close with many of the “sisters” I found there. I’ve also had wonderful luck working for several supportive female bosses who in turn taught me how to be a supportive boss. You are right. There is power in sisterhood.
RachelintheOC saysMay 1, 2013 at 10:12 pm
Thanks for the comment, Sarah. My older sister has had wonderful luck with female bosses throughout her career. She’s become quite close friends with several over the years — and she works in pharma also.
I’m so glad you’ve had wonderful experiences. I love the closeness women can have so quickly. It’s definitely our strength.
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Nikki Greis saysMay 2, 2013 at 9:04 am
Unfortunately, I’ve never been one to have a lot of friends. Now that I’m a parent, I have even fewer (aka zero.) But there is one person I can always call, always text, always count on: my sister James. Now I know you are thinking James is a strange name for a woman. James was a friend of ours who passed away as preschooler. As we grew up, James renounce her Christian name and became James.
We always fought to the point of drawing blood. Being only 369 days apart can do that, but it didn’t help when I skipped a grade and suddenly we were in the same grade together. There was a lot of jealousy and hate, but in high school when James suddenly started having seizures, everything changed. Because of the unique way she had seizures, James could hear everything but by some instinct folded her body up so her airway was blocked. It was my job to make sure she coulg breathe, even when that meant demanding paramedics leave her alone.
Years later, she moved miles away after we graduated college. I don’t see her that much, but I always know that I’m the first one she calls with news, good or bad, or when she just needs to talk.
RachelintheOC saysMay 2, 2013 at 8:37 pm
Thanks for sharing your story, Nikki. How amazing your relationship is with James.
It can be so much more difficult to make friends as we age, you’re so right.
I’m always amazed at how kids make it so simple. I watch my seven-year-old son walk up to a kid at the park: ‘Want to be friends?’ And boom. Friends.
I don’t know if it’s laziness on our part as we age, that we’re set in our ways, wary, or just overwhelmed by life in general that makes it more difficult to connect on a deeper, more personal level. I do know this: just discussing it connects us. All of us.
Thanks so much!
@Randy_Coates saysMay 2, 2013 at 4:44 pm
@RachelintheOC Interesting article: http://t.co/slMGAgYUe9 It is thought-provoking how men to men and women to women bond differently.
Renata S saysMay 2, 2013 at 8:32 pm
I don’t have any biological sister, but I have a sisterhood connection with my best friend since we were kids (we’re 35 now). But all my other close friends are men.
I understand exactly what you’ve said about the corporate world. For me it was always so hard to catch up with all the competition among women – that’s not my way at all.
Both your text and the comments were a pleasant and touching reading. Thank you very much!
Lynsey Peterson saysMay 2, 2013 at 9:19 pm
I have a sister of the heart who has been with me throgh thick and thin. She has offered me a place to stay when I was homeless, a shoulder to cry on, and all the support and love I could ever ask for. I have a hard time being around other people as I am incredibly shy and yet when I am with her, it’s like I’m home. I couldn’t ask for a better sister even if she were blood.
RachelintheOC saysMay 3, 2013 at 12:37 pm
How amazing that you have that wonderful bond with your sister/friend. I’m sad for women who don’t get to experience that. It’s a bond like no other — there are friends and there are sisters. Big difference.
Bonny MacIsaac saysMay 3, 2013 at 4:24 am
Had 3 sisters, lost one 10 years ago to mental illness. My youngest sister and I are the closest. She’s 9 years younger. We lost our mom when I was 15. The youngest was 5. I think that is why we are so close. I have to say it didn’t help bond me with the others. In my life I have friends that are closer, like sisters to me. Which I value deeply.
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Joder saysMay 4, 2013 at 7:31 pm
As me and my sister have gotten older our relationship has gotten better. We now have more in common as life as battered us both around equally. We’re a good sounding board for each other as our ways to decompress from stress are similar.
Darlene Burns saysMay 4, 2013 at 7:52 pm
It’s so refreshing to know that there is another author willing to give encouragement and support. I see your tweets all the time and I have become a better blogger because of you. I have 2 younger sisters. We have a great relationship but, are treated totally different by our mother. I will be writing about the positive aspects of our lives in between my current publication. Thank you for always keeping your fans informed. It’s invaluable in this day in age.
RachelintheOC saysMay 4, 2013 at 8:06 pm
you’re too kind, Darlene! Thank you for sharing your relationship with your sisters AND mother. That would be interesting to read about.
I often feel the same way about my childhood compared to my two sister’s — we have very different memories LOL.
hugs to you for your kind words. I really appreciate it!
Darlene Burns saysMay 5, 2013 at 2:06 pm
No problem Rachel..and the ipad would help me greatly with all the projects I have coming up. I love giving credit where credit is due.
Hugs to you as well.
And again you are so welcome..
P.S. my sisters remember it a little different as well! 😉
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