Please, do me a favor. Don’t tell me how pretty my green eyes are, that you love wild redheads, or that you want to do things to me that my husband would not approve of. I’d rather get myself some fetish equipment in ododi than do things that degrade my dignity.
I’m not on social media to fuck you.
I’m on social media to build up my author platform and social media business. To connect with readers in a way that conservatives would still probably not approve of (She curses! #gasp), that isn’t icky or requires the exchange of bodily fluids. To create bonds with both men and women that are purely platonic. There are tons of dating sites, dating guides and more but all the effective means on how to get a girl is at Dating9, I’m not saying perfectly that they have what you are looking for so it’s still best to look out for other sites as well and, find out more about them and use the one that best fits your personality, don’t use generic social media sites to look for dates, that’s not playing the game properly. A website like amoroushug.com can help you choose which call girls you like and what date you are looking for.
Before you think I think I’m all that, here is a sampling of the come-ons just this month:
- Will you be a ‘cam girl’ for my wife and I? (So considerate to include her, don’t you think?)
- If we both weren’t married, would you Skype fuck me? (Is that a thing? I didn’t know that was a thing. Apparently, it’s a thing.)
- I’d like to cover you with Nutella and then lick it off your body. (Me: I have a better idea. Put it on some bread.)
- Will you lower your price for social media consulting if I tell you how hot you are? (Me: The price just doubled.)
I feel sorry for some men. Society teaches guys that to ‘get’ a woman, they have to say ridiculous things like this — I mean, do they hear themselves? I feel sorry for women, too. Makeup, hair dye, exercise, eating lettuce leaves and pretending to like it — all to get a man.
One woman told me I should feel flattered — isn’t it a compliment that guys say things like this to me? Um…what? (And that’s a whole other post.)
Whatever happened to just being ourselves? How about not focusing on what we get but what we give (okay, I may have to rethink that one for you pervs out there). Sharing books, music, writing poetry, enjoying a good meal…okay, so some of that’s difficult if a guy is in one place and the object of his affection is in another, but isn’t that what Skype IS for?
Listen, there are lots of people who are on social media to find a fuck buddy, chicks included. And I make no judgement about that. Do whatever blows your skirt up. Just don’t assume that all women are there for the same thing. Many of us are professionals and want — no expect — to be treated as such. Some of us are just there for fun and that’s fine, too. And hey, we don’t mind the occasional compliment or flirt — many of us are flirts, too. But there’s a line — we all know what that line is. (Hint: it’s located above your genitals.)
Before you say I’m hating on men, I’ll stop you right there because it’s some (not all) men who are behaving this way (and some women, too, no doubt, just not with me). Or go ahead and say I’m a man-hater — it won’t be my first time. Call me whatever you want, just do it without mentioning my breasts.
Some of my favorite people in the world are men, and the reason I adore them is because they treat me with kindness and respect. Try treating women on social media just like you would any other human (unless you’re a total dumbass — then try a different approach). And here’s a tip: if a woman is interested, she’ll let you know.
(Oh, and sending us pix of your junk does you no favors. Keep the mouse in the house.)
Hi Rachel, nicely said. I’m blown away at the comments you posted – I wonder what proportion of women online get the same thing. It’s amazing that even in the tech arena this neanderthal mindset continues.
Toby
Thank you, Toby. Most of it is just such nonsense, it doesn’t surprise me anymore. But occasionally, I just have to shake my head and thank, ‘Really. You honestly just said that.’ LOL
and it happens to A LOT of women, sadly.
xx
I get creepy disgusting come-ons on Twitter all the time. I never act flirty on any social media platform so it blows my mind when some idiot thinks that I would be accepting of their really explicit suggestion. I even had a guy suggest my photo (which shows zero skin and where I am not even smiling) showed I “must get a lot of sex” and then eh proceeded to tell me all the kinky stuff he would do to me.
I just don’t understand the mindset of men who think “She is on social media and talking….I will hit her up for sex or cybersex/Skype sex”.
I feel ya. I didn’t even discuss the guy who wanted me to meet him on some cybersex site — ugh.
And it’s true — Skype and Facebook are just as bad. I only use Skype for business and talking w/ family, but get requests frequently from guys wanting to video chat. Icky. What’s scary is the young kids (both male and female) who do want to video chat, not realizing there’s a perv on the other end.
I don’t have a solution, except to teach our kids well and not to be creepy to others!
xx
I can imagine that about seventeen seconds after the invention of social media, a whole phalanx of frustrated perverts, closet misogynists & narcissistic wankers with an inflated notion of their own attractiveness leapt with joy and exclaimed ‘Finally! A consequence-free platform upon which I can directly connect with the literally millions of women who have been waiting breathlessly for my triumphant debut on the global internet! Praise something or other! Where did I put that webcam?’
Idiots. I hope when the internet finally becomes self-aware the first thing it does is name & shame all these tossers.
G
I love your responses, Gareth, because I always learn more wonderful words (tossers will be my new fav).
Seriously, is it pure ego? I know woman troll also for guys — my guess is it’s the anonymity of it. You can put up a picture of some model and say it’s you to get chicks (or guys). Sad state.
Tossers.
LOVE your article, Rachel!! So spot on!
Personally, I think a large portion of the pervs are guys who have no clue how to interact with people. They’re social misfits and social media allows them to interact without consequence, just like you said, Gareth. They have probably said the same thing to women in public, walked away with stinging face and grumbled in their mother’s basement beating their sausage. NOW they get to say the same things to women and only worry about being blocked or reported, only to create a another profile…rinse and repeat. Ewwwww! They might not even rinse!
I do love social media for the same reasons you mentioned in your article, Rachel. Unfortunately, again as Gareth said, “a whole phalanx of frustrated perverts, closet misogynists & narcissistic wankers” have been begging for such an opportunity and they’ve finally discovered an outlet for their lack of social skills.
Thanks for posting and I LOVE your candid, honest approach…you and I have a lot in common. Wanna Skype?? lol
Thanks so much, Arial. I love your comments. Spot on about mom’s basement.
A friend just shared that she’d love to write articles like this but is worried about using curse words or that people won’t share it — and I get that. I guess, having put three books out of my experiences, I’ve kinda moved past that.
And with this subject, I figured why not? What these tossers (thanks, Gareth) say is much worse, right? It reflects more on them than on me. Whatevs. It’s my blog LOL!
Thanks again for reading and commenting.
I think if cussing is not something your friend does, she should steer clear of it. Kinda like when Mr. Spock and Kirk cursed in Star Trek IV…”Well…double dumbass on you!” Yeah….just doesn’t come across right. LOL
Your personality shines through in your posts, and THAT’S what makes it so good. Go ON wit’ yo’ bad self, woman!
This is just a hunch, but I’d be willing to bet that before acting this way on the internet these people would never have dreamed of harassing someone in person: probably they never got as far as being knocked back. *After* behaving atrociously online, though, and suffering no real consequences as a result, I bet that emboldened at least some of them enough that they’re harassing people in person now. It would be interesting to see some data on this.
THAT might be some scary stats!
Wow. What century is this again? I thought we got over that kind of ass-hattery ages ago. Damn.
you would think. apparently…not.
3 words. I love you.
Love you back.
I just fell off the toilet and hit my head. Damn you Rachel. Must you write such genius??
Ha! Sorry about that and thank you, Dean.
hugs.
Rachel! I just want to say….Thank You!!! and I LOVE YOU!!!!
Honestly the jerks that run around on the internet are amazing, sometimes I’m not sure I’m glad they are hanging out where we simply have to hit delete or not….stalkers who are lower than snakes are everywhere both men and women! But like you I think I encounter far more who can hide behind the mask of the internet!
You rock lady I love your post and I love your “Snark”!
Thank you, sweet Chhaya.
It’s sad that this happens, but I’m a big girl — lots of people want sex. And to be truthful, if they were polite about it and not assumptive, I’d still turn them down (LOL) but it wouldn’t be QUITE as offensive.
One guy scolded me for not saying that I’m married on my Twitter bio — ya know, so he would have known not to ask me for sex. Unbelievable.
thank you for your kind comments.
xx
Keep the mouse in the house. Classic, Red. The thing that shocks (and bothers) me is that your social media presence speaks for itself and I can’t believe cretins assume that “cruising” serious blogs is fair territory. As you said, if the blog or site is created quite obviously for reciprocation to such wanderpevs, so be it. But your nothing if not one of the most professional, determined, successful “social media representatives” out there. Nothing in your postings, profile, books, attitude, or ambition even HINT at your presence being anything but what it is. Unreal. I’d say I’m sorry, but you’re a stronger soul than me when it comes to dealing with these douchenozzles. They’ll discover you’re the last person they should be hounding.
Thanks, sweet Rob. You’re always so lovingly supportive of me. Mwah.
Like I said, flirting and silliness is one thing. Let’s have fun! Fine. But asking/demanding sex just because I’m a woman? NO.
This is a bigger issue than my one little post can possibly address, but I felt I had to put it out there. I often wonder how these guys would feel if someone was saying this crap to their wives/sisters/mothers? Who knows. Maybe they wouldn’t care.
xx
Douchenozzles…hee hee! Stealing that one!!
Nutella? Everyone knows Nutella belongs in crepes with strawberries.
Love,
Janie
Three words. Always be yourself. And, yeah ignore the spud heads.
LOL, love spud heads. Funny fella.
Be glad you’re not a romance/erotica writer. The inappropriateness doesn’t end with social media. Once my banker found out what I wrote, his customer service went WAY beyond customer service.
Which leads me to another complaint. Why are romance writers sluts? Are horror writers serial killers? No. In real life, I’m actually pretty dull. So don’t go thinking I’m gonna drop my panties and act out my book for you. Sheesh.
I’m truly sorry. I’ve heard similar stories from erotica author friends. In fact, I have an erotica client and she says the same thing (though she’s an MBA, married w/ children, is active in her church, and has a day job in a large corporation!). Good lord — writers do have imaginations!
I just don’t get the whole assumptions thing. And what happened to respect? Ack.
I get constant emails on facebook from men telling me that they love my smile or my eyes or whatever, asking if we can email to get to know each other. It is disheartening to realize that there are so many men out there scouring the sites and writing to strangers. My profile states that I am married. I usually write back and tell them that facebook is not a dating site and that women don’t appreciate strange men contacting them.
Also, women have been writing to me on facebook telling me that they liked my profile and want to get to know me better, and they instruct me to contact them on their private email, NOT through facebook. What is that about???
Gosh, maybe it’s a redhead thing! I don’t know.
My FB profile also says married. I think people just don’t care. And Skype is just as bad. I’ve been hit on twice by men who then stalked me — one threatened me to the point I called the police (who did nothing, of course). It’s very scary to be a professional woman and deal w/ this. It’s gone on forever in real life — maybe it’s a good thing these people are online and (hopefully) far away.
If it helps, I’ve changed ALL my privacy settings on FB and Skype — I don’t put my real city anywhere or provide personal info with regard to my kids’ schools or family, etc. Some people will look for anything. Good luck, sweet.
If these things were said face-to-face, it’d be considered sexual harassment and IMO should be considered so online too. Unfortunately though, there’s an element of virtual existence where people feel they can say all sorts of things behind a keyboard they would never have the guts to say to someone’s face. Armchair-warriors, et all. Thankfully I’ve had very little of this kind of harassment from real people via social media. However, I have to say, it’s not necessarily socially awkward folks who pull stunts like this. And it’s sad that the more successful someone is (or appears to be) the more they have to put up with nonsense like this.
Thanks for your comments, Julia. I remember listening to a radio show in So Cal years back and the person said, when it comes to gossip, if you can’t say something to someone’s face, why would you say it at all?
The sad truth is our society encourages this type of anonymous commentary or in this case, propositions — in fact, thrives on it. That doesn’t make it okay, or right, or even all that interesting. But some people thrive on it. I can’t even read the comments on most news sites — it becomes so trollish and backbiting, which takes away from some of the fabulous stuff that’s written. Same with reviews — people are just awful.
There is and always will be a percentage of the population who sees nothing wrong with this behavior and that is more of a problem than anything else.
Off my soapbox! thanks again for reading and commenting.
Actually, this wouldn’t be considered “sexual harassment” unless it occurred in the workplace. It is a common misconception that “sexual harassment” exists to protect women from sexually offensive language anywhere.
Saying inappropriately sexual things to women (outside of work) is protected by the 1st amendment. There are certain avenues one can take if the same person keeps doing it over and over, but even then you have to prove a lot to get the police involved, or to even get anywhere with a civil suit.
Actually, I have to disagree with you there, Tom, on whether inappropriate sexual statements are protected by the 1st amendment — not true. The Supreme Court has ruled that obscenity is not protected by the First Amendment, but the courts still need to determine what material is obscene in each case. (Wikipedia)
Regardless, my article was more about respect for women on social media than about whether men are protected by the law. I appreciate you weighing in.
I am reminded why I adore you!
XO
I adore you more, Jackie! xx
Oh my goodness, thank you for writing this one! It was funny, and empowering!
Thank you, Cheryl. Empowerment is so important for women, absolutely. I’m honored you see that in my writing. xx
Thank you for writing about this is such a straightforward, inspiring (and yet funny) way! Unfortunately, this kind of crap happens all over — even goodreads! What blows me away is that these guys actually think in some part of their nut-sized brain that this approach could work. Or maybe not. Maybe they are more than stupid. Maybe they are misogynist jerks who are doing everything they can to intimidate women. Looks like they tried on the wrong woman!
Thank you, Katie!
And oh yes, I know it does. Social media is not a bar, though many people (women included) treat it as such. Fine, whatever. I’m not a prude and enjoy some mild flirting myself. That’s not at all what this is about, as you know. If I play ‘Feel Like Makin’ Love’ by Bad Company, does that mean I’m looking for a lay? No! But some guys see it that way. (It’s akin to wearing sexy clothing…does that mean I deserve it? NO.)
I do what I recommend to my clients: stay focused on why we are there — to connect with readers and build relationships. No different that blogging, really. It’s all about making connections. Yes, not icky, sticky ones. LOL.
Sorry, had to. xx
Love it, love it, love it…. I sometimes say to them, what is it in my profile that makes you think I’m on Twitter to find sexual partners?????? Though usually I just ignore and block. As you say – fair enough, if you’re on any social networking site to get laid, go for it – but perhaps try to suss out your potential lays first… it’s like the friend requests from single mates of ‘real life’ friends on Facebook – WHY would I want to add you? I don’t know you!!!! I think it’s because some people don’t understand the purpose(s) of social networking sites, and think they’re just free online dating sites.
Anyone who calls you a man-hater after reading this post is completely thick and has missed the whole point of what you’re saying. Hardly worth even arguing the toss (no pun intended).
LOVE your comments, Terry.
Listen, there are beauty queens out there who are definitely looking for a lay — I’m not saying that this behavior is at all limited to men. I’m just sharing my experiences and that I’m tired of it.
I wrote about something similar in my latest book: when I worked corporate in the 90s, and a male manager sexually harassed me in front of a group of guys (let’s just say ‘ass-shaking’ was in the comment). When I reported it to my female manager, she told me I should have been flattered ‘I wish someone would sexually harass me!’ she said, and pointed to her pregnant belly. She refused to report it. ‘Boys will be boys.’
Sigh. I’m happy to quote Justin Timberlake ‘do that ass-shakin’ thing you do’ but that doesn’t mean I want some random guy to proposition me. IT’S JUST A SONG.
LOL. Thanks for the comments. You rock! And grats on your eFestival of Words win!
Cheeeeers!
Indeed – so many women perpetrate sexism…. oh, don’t get me started! The 70% that let it go, or think it’s just fun, or react like your manager, make the 30% of us that DON’T seem like chip-on-the-shoulder men haters….. grrrrrr to compliant little girl-women with the Cinderella Complex!!!
Re article for you, will do it shortly, just waiting on my new book cover being ready 🙂
I’ve been thinking about this through the night and decided to go ahead and post this simply because a commenter’s statement about this matter being protected speech troubles me. Poor and offensive behavior being excused by juvenile application of constitutional rights is what allows this sort of culture to inbreed.
Sorry to burst that man’s bubble, but since Miller v. California (1973) the Supreme Court has used that ruling’s 3-pronged “Miller Test” in regards to this issue: material is drfined as obscene if 1) the average person, applying community standards, would find that it appeals to shameful or morbid sexual interests; (2) it depicts or describes patently offensive sexual conduct; and (3) it lacks serious literary, artistic, political, or scientific value.
Therefore, if the average person would find it offensive to blatantly sexually harass a woman then guess what, it is. Not protected. And I’m sorry, if a man thinks that is protected then the problem is with the man.
Right on, lady. I adore you.
I was honestly surprised (why am I surprised?) that a man would consider it his RIGHT to sexually proposition women. WTF? Who thinks that? As you say, it’s a problem with the man. Sadly, it becomes all our problem.
xx
It is messages like the ones you received that have become so “acceptable” in our culture that some people don’t even bat an eye at the suggestive nature of it all. Media has made it so easy for men (and women) to get away with disgusting behavior, all because we as a society have become immune to it.
Situations like these are my motivation to one day raise a respectful son that will (hopefully) become a man that respects women and sees their ability to be more than just objects to be conquered.
Thank you for sharing this!
Thanks for commenting, Amanda. You make great points — it has become acceptable — look at who our kids watch (Miley Cyrus much?). Scary indeed.
I do have a son — age 7, almost 8 — and I talk with both my kids frequently about acceptable behavior, respect, and taking responsibility for their actions. Much of what I see happening is that men (and yes, women too) use some sort of excuse to justify their behavior. That’s so common. Just like the commenter here who brought up (incorrectly) that obscenity is his right under the first amendment.
The fact that people think it’s their right to be sexually inappropriate (according to accepted social norms) goes to much of what I shared here today.
thank you for reading and commenting!
Thank you. Thank you. Thank you. Your message is beautifully stated and one that is long overdue for both men and women.
Love it Rachel. And you’re so right. I had one guy send me a LinkedIn invitation and his profile picture was his dick in his hand! I mean come on. Who wants to see that? Worst thing – I was at work when I opened the invitation so there it was for the whole damn office to see. Some of the others I’ve had: a guy asking for my home address so he could send me a cheque for my latest book. Yeah – NO!!! The rest have been fairly tame in comparison but I did have to get my husband to completely block one guy from ever contacting me again, who kept sending me suggestive messages. On a completely different but related theme, I’m also not on social media to invest in your company, or sign up for some Mumbai scam, or any of the other spam things I get sent every day.
I know. Sometimes I want to ignore all of it but the good outweighs the bad and the amazing people and connections I’ve made are worth sticking around.
I get these all the time. “I like your picture. You don’t look old enough to have two kids.” Idiots. My Facebook profile pic is a DOLL! Some of the PMs are disgusting and they get mad when I turn them down. I have all the PMs all saved, just in case I need ammo.
I do wonder if some of them are just bots, because a real person would know that! LOL.
I’ve had some real creeps on Skype. I don’t friend anyone over there unless it’s a client and we need to converse. My mood message says: If I don’t know you, don’t even bother. It’s sad that it’s come to that. Not because I think I’m all that — it happens to many women (and men, I’m sure). So many stalkers and slimy people out there. It’s smart to be careful.
My son is a computer whiz and has offered his virus delivery services to these slimeballs. I told him thank you but they most likely have plenty of viruses.
I’ve never understood people who feel so emboldened and think there are literally millions of women (or men) who are just waiting breathlessly at their keyboards waiting for them to come along and sweep them off their feet with lines like,”Do you Cyber?”. Ahhh, the stories to tell the grandkids *eyeroll*.
I was responding to someone’s question on IMDb about Geena Davis’ shoe size. There seemed to be some debate about if her feet could be as large as stated (don’t ask). I mentioned that it’s not outside the realm of possibility since I’m a female, 5’10” and have size 12 feet and Geena is a bit taller than me. The response sounded normal until the end. Here it is in it’s entirety:
“Thank-you for replying to my post. Yes I knew a lady who was also 6’1 and has size 12w feet. I tried her heels on once for fun and they fit me exactly. I wear a size 11 men’s. I’m a 5’8 male and thought my feet were big for my height. At just 2 inches taller than me you have the same size feet as me. Do you have trouble finding pretty shoes? I bet your feet look sexy in heels.”
I mean, what the hell? I’m also the size of a right tackle and happily married. I think I was a bit happier before the internet thinking there are freaks out there but that they normally drive windowless vans and mumble to themselves. Many, many thoughts are better left unsaid and frankly, if you wouldn’t say them in an actual room with mixed company, you should avoid saying it on the internet.
I don’t mean to laugh, but you cracked me up (I’m also the size of a right tackle) is classic. Funny story but also sad, right?
I often talk with folks about being their authentic, real selves and I get push back — it’s as if being ourselves isn’t good enough online, so people make up all kinds of crap to make themselves appear to be — different. I think being fake comes across when people really start reading our blog posts and tweets and FB posts — it’s almost like lying about who we are.
One guy on Skype (after I told him I only use it for business or to chat with family and that I’M MARRIED) sent me pictures of himself — thank god it was just his face LOL — and each picture looked completely different — as in, one was bald, one had hair, one had green eyes, the other brown. Totally different men! I told him I was blocking him and the next time he tries to pick up women online, he might want to keep track of the pix he sends. *face palm*
I don’t get it either. I just…don’t.
Does this really happen a lot?
When I met my wife, early 2008, one of our major hurdles was her fear/distrust of the internets and my complete trust in it. She was convinced I was a lot like these guys you speak of, or something.
I love being a writer and have plenty of what I need at home. Am I just a weirdo where this is concerned with guys and the internet?
Anyway, redheads scare me, I respect fellow writers, especially female ones, and I don’t know how to Skype. I hope we can be friends, but not “those’ kinds of friends.
LOL, Lance.
It’s not constant, but it happens enough that I felt I wanted to write about it. One guy (whom I didn’t write about) scolded me for not saying that I’m married on my profile. I told him that I’m on social media to connect with readers and other writers — what does being married have to do with anything? Pft.
Takes all kinds. 🙂
brilliant, great read. sums up most men, unfortunately
There are lots of great men out there who, like Lance, are perfectly happy with their home life and would never treat women like that.
Then there are those who aren’t … and somehow I get my share. Regardless, it makes for good blog post fodder :).
you are quite right, im very happy with my wife and family.
Reminds me of when I was dating, and I’m sure it’s only gotten worse in the past 8 years that I’ve been married. Here’s the scenario: Me: this is a great restaurant!
Him: Wanna have sex?
Me: Um, no, let’s talk about something else. What things do you like to do?
Him: I like snowboarding, photography. Wanna have sex?
This was more than a few of my dates. SOoooo glad I’m not in the dating world anymore!
Hi Serena — thanks for reading and commenting.
It’s sad, really, because that kind of behavior completely disregards who you are as a person — you’re merely an object. If that’s all he wanted, he could have watched porn and um, gotten busy alone. It’s definitely a societal thing: men are encouraged to ‘get some,’ while women are whores if they do the same. Those kinds of precepts are ingrained in our culture — in most cultures.
It’s also interesting that many countries allow men to treat their women like property — again, the ‘object’ of ownership, as opposed to a living, thinking, feeling person. That dichotomy is at the basis of most abuse IMHO. Anyway, different topic. Sorry!
A big problem, I think, is that we live in a culture that largely panders to men, specifically white males 18-35, and the strongest message sent by most media targeting this demographic is that women are “made for” men to be “used” in a certain way. In other words, if we see you as objects, not people, then it doesn’t matter what language we use because you don’t have feelings, and if you don’t give into us after the requisite three dates, then you “don’t know your place.” As a young men, I got this message a lot from the media, and it severely affected my ability to communicate and relate to women.
Wow, not I’m feeling a bit edgy about my first interaction with you. Remember, I referenced something in the 1980s and suggested that you were probably too young to know about that, only to discover that you and I are the same age. Trust me, that wasn’t a come-on–I honestly thought you were around 30.
Hi Matthew — thanks for commenting. I adore your honesty (and anyone who says I look 30 is aces in my book :).
You’re right tho — in college especially, the expectation was for sex, even if the date was a simple game or dinner. I dated one football player in college — and by dated I mean he invited me over for dinner (canned spaghetti — barf) and proceeded to push me onto his bed. I’m not very big, but I was VERY vocal with him that while I was there for the dinner he promised me, he clearly had something else in mind.
I vaguely recall him wiping spaghetti off his walls as I walked out the door.
There’s definitely that expectation and as you say, is it from how our young men are raised, or more (as was how it seemed to me) that he had to report in on Monday that he’d banged a young co-ed. It’s the peer pressure to perform more than anything. That kind of pervasive ‘nail her’ precept has been a cultural norm for — who knows how long? It’s about respect as I see it. And not ALL guys are this way — not making a generalization.
Anyway, definitely something to ponder as I raise my own boy and girl. Thanks agin, Matthew!
Well, in this blog I’m struggling with, I find that my issues were less about how I was raised and more about the other cultural influences. I had a father who I compare in my mind to the lone Western hero like Gary Cooper in High Noon, standing alone against the influences of the world for the salvation of my mind (Guido in Life Is Beautiful, if you want another more perfect example).
When I got off to college, so many things in the the media told me how to treat a woman as less-than, but when the rubber hit the road, Dad’s upbringing ultimately won out. There’s a reason I never pinned a woman on the bed or tried to force myself past her breaking point when she said to stop … it’s because my good father showed me how to treat women in the way he honored my mother and was absolutely respectful of all women. When I spoke at his funeral, I noted that for Dad, even a wolf whistle when a pretty girl walked by was shameful … he was just that fine a gentlemen.
There are men like him still out there, and even though we may flirt with the dark side in our young adult years, it’s the seeds planted by our role models during our formative years that determines what kind of men we become.
That’s the way I see it anyway … and if I ever get my blog on the same subject completed, I’ll let you review it before I post it.
Sadly, Skype-fucking is a thing. A scary, terrible thing that has 60 yr old+ creepers announcing “I NEED YOU!!” and making you throw up more than a little in your mouth. And by “you” I really mean “me” cause, ewwwww.
Fuckin’ A Rachel! It seems that many people don’t understand life. Value and respect for other humans should always come first in every situation, even if you ARE just there to find a fuck buddy. Respect and value are hotter than anything on the market anyway, but not when they’re dishonest plays solely used to manipulate a person into a sexual situation. I’ve always felt respect and value should be established as a priority above all feelings of sexual attraction…
*Dick pic*
😉
LOL