You Are What You Eat (or Why My Mom Got Angry and Yelled at Me When I Went Vegetarian) by Chris O’Brien

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You Are What You Eat: The Vegetarian Wars by Chris O’Brien (
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You Are What You Eat (or Why My Mom Got Angry and Yelled at Me When I Went Vegetarian) by Chris O’Brien

One time, a friend of a friend I had just met said to me, “You know Hitler made all the German soldiers go vegetarian and it was the first state-promoted instance of a vegetarian diet.” Read more about Exipure benefits.

I don’t even remember how it came up that I was a vegetarian. I think I just mentioned that a place nearby had good sandwiches and he asked me what I had. Then he asked me why I got something without meat as if I had committed a crime. Even though that is the case, I  know that my meal has total restore ingredients that has the capability to fill up nutrients that I can get in meat.

I was frustrated, but I wasn’t surprised.  This wasn’t the first and wouldn’t be the last time I’d get this kind of reaction after revealing I didn’t eat meat. To deal with this kind of diet, my nutritionist recommended me the kratom pills, you should try them too. However, my nutritionist also said that I could also use kratom powder to any recipe that I want, but before starting I should first learn beginner recipes using kratom powder.

UM…MOM

“What is wrong with you? What? So, now you’re not gonna eat my steaks? You love my steaks! They’re your favorite. They’ve always been your favorite. What are you gonna eat? Salad? Boring. You’re stupid. You look sick. Doesn’t your hair look greasy? This is insane!”

My mom said this to me one night, a few months after I went vegetarian. I don’t remember her exact words, I just remember how upset she was and how confused it made me. I remember her shooting insults at me about my hair, about how it was somehow painful for her, and how it didn’t make sense—like [share ]I was somehow violently betraying who I really was[/share].

That last part made a little bit of sense to me. If you had known me growing up, you’d have guessed I’d be the last person in the world to go vegetarian. I would have eaten steak every night if I could. I would have never eaten a single vegetable if I had my way and if I were absolutely required to, then it had to be served in a pool of ranch dressing.

WHY I BECAME A VEGATARIAN

That changed, though. Late in my time at college, I began to play around with the idea of cutting meat out of my diet, and start using weight loss pills from the phentramin-d review that I have read, I can say that it is far more effective. Practically good if you’re on a diet to lose weight.. I had classes that year with two professors who were vegetarian. One I had known since my first year. He was a vegan concerned with animal rights. He was also a progressive liberal, a feminist, and a theater director/professor.

The other I had just met. I was taking my first class with him. He was an ovo-lacto vegetarian (he ate dairy and eggs) for personal reasons. I remember he once explained to me why he didn’t eat meat. “That’s flesh,” he said, more or less, “from an animal. It’s muscle and fat, just like I have. I can’t wrap my head around eating that.” Unlike the theater professor, he was politically conservative. He was also religious, and he was the chair of the Classics and Foreign Languages department. For more information about healthy supplements visit amny.com/.

They were two very different men with very different world views and very different reasons for not eating animals, but together, [share ]they inspired me to reconsider my feelings about eating meat[/share]. I never thought to ask them how the choice had affected their relationships with their parents, their best friends, or maybe complete strangers who might happen to see them enjoying hummus and toasted pita bread at a barbecue. I just had a lot of respect for them both and their dietary choices got me thinking. I didn’t realize how many relationships and potential future relationships I’d damage by making a lifestyle choice that seemed to affect no one but me.

However, I did realize, at twenty-two years old and about to graduate college, that I was no longer the seven-year-old boy who begged his mom to cook sirloin steak every night of the week. [share ]I wasn’t comfortable eating animals anymore[/share] and I hadn’t been for some time. I was finally being honest with myself about it.

To put it another way, I felt bad every time I ate a burger and not because it was greasy, but because I thought about the cow that had died to make it.

Eating meat became entirely unenjoyable. If I had been forced to do any part of the process of turning an animal into food myself, prior to unwrapping the meat and cooking it, I wouldn’t have been able to. I would never be capable of killing an animal, skinning, gutting, cleaning, and butchering it and being aware of all that made me unable to eat animals and I rather get the nutrient from weight loss pills and supplements from riverfronttimes.com.

So I stopped.

It was hard. Not avoiding meat. Avoiding meat was easy. It was actually surprising how easy I found it to adjust to life without burgers, fried chicken, and ham sandwiches. What was hard was figuring what it meant for my identity. Steak had been my favorite food all my life. Buffalo wings were my favorite snack to eat during pub trivia games. I had developed a deep affection for spicy tuna sushi during my time at college, unfortunately my health didn’t take it the best way, I had to find a gastroenterologist in West Orange.

Now, what did I like? Now who was I? I was a vegetarian, but what else?

Eventually, I found new favorites and other things to identify with. Avocados. Pizza. French Fries. Beer. I had changed, which required adjusting, but eventually I got comfortable. I also searched “can dogs eat french fries” for the my dog’s health. The people around me took longer to adjust and even now, I’m not entirely sure everyone really has.

Since going vegetarian, it’s not just my mom who has given me a hard time about it. At times, my dad has, too. So have aunts, uncles, cousins, close friends, a couple of women I briefly dated, co-workers, clients and customers, and even complete strangers. That was the first and last time I ever spoke to him and we had been introduced by a good, mutual friend. What made him so upset about my choice to eat a vegetarian diet that he felt absolutely compelled to compare me to perpetrators of genocide?

WHY PEOPLE HAVE A HARD TIME 

I’ve had people yell at me. I’ve had people laugh at me. I’ve had people groan and wretch like a toddler forced to take Dimetapp for a cough in regard to a veggie wrap I was eating for lunch, as I was eating it.

For a long time, I didn’t get it. The anger seemed so unwarranted. I didn’t understand why everyone who found out I was vegetarian said, “Oh so you must like really love salad, huh?”

Why did everyone feel the need to ask where I got my protein?

(I get it the same place steak does, by the way—protein is really not that scarce in plant sources.) Why did anyone care what I ate or not at all?

I figured at least some of the animosity I received was because of other vegetarians who had given the rest of us a bad name. We’ve all heard the stories of militant non-meat-eaters, shoving their beliefs down the throats of others, constantly preaching the gospel of the plant-based diet, and calling anyone who happens to enjoy a hamburger once or twice a month a “murderer.”

The thing is, I’ve never met a single vegetarian who behaves so rudely. I’m sure at least some are out there, but in my experience, it’s not all that common. Most vegetarians pick their moments. They know there are times and places for that kind of behavior, and usually only speak about their personal dietary choices when asked specifically about them. Most will avoid the topic altogether, if possible. I suggest you look for more weight loss recipes you can make at home.

You Are What You Eat (or Why My Mom Got Angry and Yelled at Me When I Went Vegetarian) by Chris O’Brien

Over the last couple of years, I slowly came up with another answer. The cliché is true; you are what you eat. It doesn’t just apply to health, but to identity as well.

Perhaps as much as almost any other thing, food is tied to how people understand who they are.

IDENTITY

It’s all in how a person’s identity is built. People identify as individuals, but also as part of a family, a region, an ethnic background, a religion, and a nation. All of these parts of an individual’s identity have unique foods at the center.

So, when a vegetarian actively rejects meat, some people respond negatively because they connect it to a very specific list of things they identify strongly with—“My favorite food, buffalo wings” “My family’s secret recipe for meat loaf,” “My state’s most famous dish, clam chowder,” “My ethnic background’s traditional meal, corned beef and cabbage,” “My religion’s customary holiday meal, Turkey,” “My country’s quintessential dinner, burgers and hot dogs,” and so on.

I’ve come to believe that some people get angry at vegetarians not because we don’t eat meat, but because they feel as though our rejection of meat is a rejection of them personally and everything they are. I don’t think it’s conscious or deliberate, but at least some people hear the word “vegetarian” and subconsciously think, “They’re not like me. In fact, they hate the things that make me who I am. They think who I am is wrong.” Then they direct their anger at the nearest non-meat-eater.

Why did my mom scream insults at me that one night so long ago? It wasn’t as if I waited to sit down to a meal she had already prepared for me to tell her about my new dietary restrictions. I was over at her place to eat some popcorn and watch a movie, maybe drink some coffee. In fact, I only brought it up in an attempt to be polite, so the next time I did come for dinner, she wouldn’t have to feel bad, and I wouldn’t have to uncomfortably eat food I did not feel ethically or physically comfortable eating.

At least in part, I’m sure she felt like I wasn’t the son she had known and loved anymore if I didn’t keep enjoying my favorite foods. I can imagine it would be pretty upsetting to feel like you don’t know your own child. Still, it was so strange that this woman had spent more than twenty years begging me to eat my broccoli and now that I wanted to, she was livid about it.

I think the bigger reason she was so upset is that by telling her I didn’t eat meat anymore, I effectively told her I was rejecting her steak, the thing she made best. Maybe to a degree, she felt like I was rejecting her as my mother. Of course, I wasn’t. It took a while, but she grew to understand that. My mom and I are on good terms now. She remembers and respects that I don’t eat meat these days, even if she still teases me now and then.

Who am I now? Yes, I am a vegetarian. I’m also an actor and a writer. I’m in love with Gilmore Girls and Arrested Development. I am happily addicted to social media. I love coffee, orange juice and fruit drinks (read more here), and pizza. I hate salad, but only on principle. I love the gluten-free corn bread my cousin makes for her daughter and me at Christmas, and I have become borderline obsessed with pão de queijo, Brazilian cheese bread. And I’m constantly on the lookout for new recipes and kitchen accessories at sites like kitchenbar.net.

I am a son, a friend, a boyfriend, and I am what I eat… but that doesn’t necessarily mean I’m not what I don’t.

. . .

Note: Chris also has celiac disease, meaning he can’t eat gluten which is found in most wheat-based foods, like bread, pasta, beer, or basically anything good in the world. So if this article seemed a bit angry to you, be nice to Chris. He might be a little grumpy because he hasn’t had much to eat lately.

If you write a comment, Chris would like you to include your favorite food or dish and what how you think it relates to your identity. Share who you are!

About Chris O’Brien

You Are What You Eat (or Why My Mom Got Angry and Yelled at Me When I Went Vegetarian) by Chris O’BrienA native of Rhode Island, Chris is an actor and a writer currently living in Los Angeles, CA. He has a BA in English Literature from Roger Williams University in Bristol, RI, where he studied Theatre as a second major.

Chris O’Brien is a young actor with a lot of experience, known for his trademark sense of humor balanced by an uncommon emotional depth. His range and ability to find the humor hidden in drama and the vulnerability behind comedy has helped him land roles in every genre on every media platform.

Chris is perhaps best known for playing Mark in Found Footage 3D, currently in post-production. He’s also known for playing Ewan McBay on Classic Alice, a hot new webseries that is drawing comparisons to award-winning series such as The Lizzie Bennet Diaries. Chris also appears in the Pet Collective’s webseries, Barely Pet Parents in which he stars along side YouTube sensation Colleen Ballinger (Miranda Sings).

Connect with him on his website and Twitter. 

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Comments

  1. You’ve never met a vegetarian who’s rude and evangelical? I envy you. I’ve met over a dozen, including ones who berated me when I *was* vegetarian for not eating “purely” enough, ie: like them (including more than one time I was lectured on the evils of stereotypical vegetarian protein, tofu). A couple of years ago I had to break off a friendship with a vegan who claimed she supported individual food choices, yet her only two dinner-time topics were veganism and losing weight. She always insisted we have a meal together when we socialised, and she’d give me these hurt looks if I ordered something non-vegan. I finally gave up when she posted a “joke”on Twitter saying anyone who ate meat was stupid.

    I have to admit, I’m a lot more leery of inviting vegetarians over for dinner, even though I still cook a lot of vegetarian main courses. Often I’ll get a, “See how good this is!” backhanded compliment on the food, or other such useless drama. Basically the same as what you say you get from omnivores.

    Reply

    • Thanks for sharing Katherine!

      We have definitely had very different experiences when it comes to the vegetarians/vegans (veg*ns for short, if you like) in our lives. that said, I see what you mean and I have definitely heard similar stories. I am really sorry about your friend and how poorly they treated you. No matter what your diets were, there’s really no excuse for their behavior. I think you were right to distance yourself from that person.

      I guess my real point was that, while I know what you wrote about happens–maybe way more often than it seems to in my experience–it hasn’t often been part of my experience and definitely isn’t the way I’ve ever behaved, so the common narrative of “the evangelical veg*ns make everyone hate the nice ones” didn’t always make sense to me.

      I’ll admit maybe I’m underestimating how many veg*ns behave that way and how often they do, but I think I really want to believe in a world where my friends hear that I’m trying out a vegetarian diet and don’t decide to get pay back on me for something their vegan cousin (or whoever) once rudely said to them at a barbecue three years ago. If I’m being treated less than great by a person, I really think the reasons are more meaningful than that.

      Does that make sense? Maybe I’m being naive.

      As for people and their backhanded compliments… that’s not great behavior either. I may have been guilty of that once or twice. I guess, for all the reasons I wrote about and more, we all get defensive about our diets sometimes, especially if we feel attacked because of what we choose to eat or not.

      Thanks again!

      Reply

  2. You’re right. It’s not about you eating or not eating steak. That steak is a symbol of your mom’s love. Now, she could change symbols. If she wants. But change might be what pisses her off. And you’ve upset the apple cart so to speak.

    I just committed to a vegan lifestyle. Seeing a crow in the backyard eating a live rat was all it took. Luckily, no one is doing the cooking for me, so I can eat whatever I darn well please.

    Ya’ gotta eat what feels right for your body. Stay the course, fellow thespian.

    Reply

    • Yeah, I realize now it was more layered and complimented than I realized. At the time it was really confusing for me because I had never done a single thing in my life that my mother didn’t support 100% and more. I’m sure she was really confused, too though. She isn’t bothered by it now. We’ve got other symbols.

      That’s an interesting story about your going vegan. You’re definitely lucky no one is cooking your food for you. When I went vegetarian, I still lived with my dad, but I mostly cooked for myself. I wasn’t quite doing all my own foodshopping yet though. It was a little bit of a tricky transition away from eating meat.

      I agree with you! You have to do what you feel is best for your body!

      Thanks so much for reading and commenting. I really appreciate it. And best of luck with acting!

      Reply

    • Well, don’t think too poorly of mom, but she used to say that and more.

      Of course, I was an adult by then. She never used words like that around me when I was a kid. In fact, she was so aware and worried about her habit for swearing like a sailor that she barely so much as whispered “crap” around me or my sister until we were around 13 years old.

      Once I had my driver’s permit and she was sitting in the passenger seat, teaching me to drive, all hands were on deck… and by “hands” I mean “words” and by “on deck” I mean, they were coming out of her mouth faster than I could understand them.

      Reply

  4. Hi Chris,

    This was very interesting to read. I have been vegetarian, although I’m not currently (it’s complicated!) and I do tend to eat lots of vegetarian and vegan food. However, I do try to make ethical food choices – meat that has been reared according to RSPCA welfare standards, free range eggs and I try to avoid other dairy because of how it is produced. I think that you are right; how you eat ties in with your identity – I like to think that I’m ethically responsible so my eating choices match that.
    I’m sorry that you’ve had such negative experiences – I think being vegie is much more common and well understood here in the UK. When I visited Florida about 10 years ago we struggled to eat out, it seemed like a foreign concept.

    Thank you for this article – it’s made me think some more about my eating choices.
    All the best.

    Paula.

    Reply

    • Hi Paula!

      Thanks very much for reading and writing that comment. I think what you describe about your diet, the fact you’ve made careful conscious choices about what you eat is something I really have a lot of respect and admiration for. Of course, not everyone has that luxury–there are a lot of challenges that might limit someone’s ability to have that much control over their diet, not least of which where they live and how much money they make. But if you can manage it, I think it’s really awesome!

      You might be right about the UK, but I’ve never been a vegetarian there so I can’t really say. I think the United States can be pretty aware and understanding about vegetarian diets, but it really depends on where you go. We’re a bigger country than a lot of people realize, even people who live here. The climate regarding veggie diets in Los Angeles will be much different than it is in Dallas. Your experience in Seattle or Portland would be very different from your experience in Orlando or Indianapolis. Where I grew up in the North-East (and where I lived when most of what I wrote about happened) felt kind of middle-of-the road. Florida a decade ago probably wasn’t the best sample of what it’s like to be vegetarian here, even if you did visit a city there. You should come visit LA sometime! Even the steak-houses have two pages of vegetarian options on the menu!

      Thanks again for reading and for the comment!

      Reply

  5. I have been a vegetarian since 1986. The most frequent comment when it comes up is this: “Oh. I used to be a vegetarian.” The other speaker then goes on to tell a story about what a mistake it was to have become a vegetarian and that now he/she has seen the light and that I could too. Friends tell me how delicious bacon is and shouldn’t I just take a bite of this casserole. Why would it matter that they used chicken broth to make it?

    I am a vegetarian because I don’t want to eat animals. My girlfriend is an omnivore and we coexist happily. I never comment on others’ dietary choices and, like you, am surprised at how freely others feel to comment on mine, almost always in a negative way.

    Reply

    • Hi, Prof Sweddy.

      Thanks for reading and commenting!

      I didn’t mention it in the post, but I have had the reaction where people tell me they used to be vegetarian and how bad it was for them too. Maybe it comes from the same place as what I was talking about, regarding identity. I don’t know.

      That and the other reactions you mentioned though generally don’t bother me. My friends don’t usually do that and even when they do, it’s usually playful teasing. I know it isn’t because they don’t respect the choices I’ve made with my diet, they just want to share something with me and I don’t think it’s ever rude to offer. Eating with people is such a central part of the way human beings socialize and build communities and bond (again, how we build identities or at least parts of our identities), so on that level it makes a lot of sense to me that even people who care about me, respect my choices, and know I don’t eat meat might still want to share their non-vegetarian food with me–just like I want to share my food with them!

      I’m actually dating someone now who eats an omnivorous diet too and it’s never been a problem for us, either. Maybe it’s different when you’re in a relationship with someone, but there might be something to take away from how it works. In general, when it comes to these sort of interactions about food, I think it just comes down to showing respect and being thoughtful about the way you talk to people about their dietary choices.

      Thanks again!

      Reply

  6. This really resonates with me. I first became vegetarian as a way to (very unhealthfully) restrict food and lose weight as a teen. It became my gateway “drug” to anorexia. So for a while into recovery, animal products I’d avoided seemed like freedom to me. I’d let go, moved on. Now that I’m fully past disordered eating and the emotional turmoil beneath, I’ve been stepping gradually into vegetarianism, finding freedom in NOT eating animal products. I eat inline with my values.

    My favorite dishes are probably Indian curries (channa masala, aloo gobi) and vegetable samosas. My mom grew up in India, and raised us on the culture. Not only are they scrumptious, but they taste like home.

    Reply

      • Hi August! Thank you so, so much for reading the post and writing about your experience a little.

        First, I’m very sorry about your struggle with anorexia. Thanks for sharing that. I know it’s the type of thing that’s not always easy to talk about, especially publicly like this. I’m really glad you’re doing better though!

        Second, I’m also really glad you’ve mostly met kind vegetarians! I think as the dietary choice becomes more mainstream, the percentage of people who feel the need to be defensive or combative at all times about their choice will proportionally decrease. That’s what I hope, at least.

        I LOVE curries! It’s not something I grew up with at all and I don’t think I even tried Indian food for the first time until I was about sixteen, but it’s amazing and I love it. Also, a lot of it tends to be gluten-free as well as vegetarian which is huge for me since being diagnosed with Celiac Disease!

        Thanks again for sharing. I’m glad it resonated with you. Writing something like this, that’s all I hope for–that it will resonate with a few people. I’m glad you connected to it!

        Reply

    • Thanks for sharing, August! I was a vegetarian for about 5 years, and my favorite foods were ethnic (still are), especially Indian and Thai. I’m no longer vege, but I still prefer no meat in my Indian and Thai food, often opting for vege or tofu versions. I enjoy the natural flavors of the dishes.

      When I became pregnant the first time, my craving for meat was incredibly strong, particularly for bacon and steak. I tried every substitute possible and nothing curbed it, so I gave in. I still limit meat consumption, sticking mostly to fish and rarely eating beef or chicken. With my second pregnancy, I wanted spicy, spicy Indian and Thai (I had a boy that time), and ate almost exclusively vege.

      I too experienced much of what Chris did — my mom, my sister-in-law (at the time), were so upset by my choice, they took it very personally, even when I offered to bring my own food. Somehow my choices were offensive to them, and every conversation landed on ‘where do you get your protein?’ as if I would wither like a leaf in the wind. As an adult, I found these conversations offensive but also kind of hilarious.

      much love!

      Reply

  7. I became a vegan for health reasons back in 1982 at a time in my life when I was probably drinking myself to death, and I’m talking about booze. The hard stuff, Lots of Scotch whiskey without ice or water and beer.

    I weighted 215 pounds and couldn’t see my feet if I looked down because my stomach was in the way. I wasn’t exercising. I was mostly eating fast food and the meat that comes with it, huge barbequed T-bones, pizza, dairy, cheese, white bread, and sugar. I loved that diet. When I went out for pizza I often followed each bite with beer—a pitcher of beer by the time I reached the last bite of pizza.

    And my health was horrible. I had headaches all the time and a churning upset stomach. I didn’t go anywhere without a supply of antacids and pain killers for the headaches. My joined ached and I mean my finger joints, me knees, my hips, me elbows. Every year I came down with the flue and colds.

    I was a mess but I was also enjoying every bite of the poison that was killing me. Then working two jobs—teaching full time days and 30 hours a week nights and weekends as a mater d in a nightclub, I met a vegan who was one of the hostesses who worked the front desk with me. She was always cheerful and never got sick when colds swept through all the other employees in that big nightclub-restauranteur combo.

    One night I asked her why and she said because she was a raw foods vegan. That raised one of my eyebrows because I’d never heard of such a lifestyle before. She introduced me to her husband who had been raised a vegan by his vegan parents and he guided me through the conversation. To say I doubted it would rescue me from all my aches, pains, colds and flue would be an understatement.

    I told him I’d try it for six months and if it didn’t work, I was going back to my meat and cheese smothered pizzas and beer.

    That was thirty-three years ago, and I’m still a vegan. I also don’t carry pain killer and anti acids around with me and I haven’t had the flu or a cold for decades.

    I love vegan apple pie—my biggest weakness. I’ve always loved apple pie but now it’s vegan and if you caramelize the right kind of apple (usually a Granny Smith), no added processed sugar included. :o)

    Oh, for the last 33 years I can look down and see my feet. There is no huge fat belly in the way.

    Reply

      • Wow! That’s a pretty amazing story. Thanks for sharing it Lloyd.

        It’s really, really great for you that it worked out that way. I’m so happy for you that you feel much healthier and more energetic now. It’s definitely good that a vegan diet worked out for you that way. Weight-loss doesn’t necessarily always equate to healthier, but it sounds like in your case they correlated and if you are happy with your body now, then that’s a good thing too!

        Of course, all that said, I feel like I should also say that I think every person has the right to exist in their body exactly as it is, regardless of how it got that way. I don’t mean to imply that you don’t know this, but for any readers looking through the comments, I think it’s worth pointing out that being “fat” does not always mean “unhealthy” and being vegan doesn’t automatically mean “healthy.” I’ve known my fair share of “junk food vegans” who ate nothing but chocolate and soda. I’ve also known my fair share of people with BMI that were probably way higher than mine who would make it much farther in a marathon than I ever could. I think there’s significant evidence out there that a person can be healthy (or unhealthy) at a much wider range of weights than we’re normally told.

        Again though, back to your particular story–that’s amazing and great! I am so happy it worked out for you that way. I can definitely see why replacing constant pizza and beer with fresh, raw foods would have a dramatic effect! I think a big lesson there is that we really just need to listen to our bodies more and try to eat accordingly.

        Thanks again and best of health to you in the future!

        Reply

        • I’ve also known a few junk food vegans and vegetarians. It doesn’t matter what lifestyle one lives, if they eat unhealthy diets, the odds heavily favor lifestyle diseases.

          I’ve suggested to family members and close friends, who eat meat, and dairy to think about drinking milk that is labeled organic (most markets sell organic dairy products today), eating organic grass fed beef, organic fed chicken and/or wild Alaska Salomon. I know it costs more but if you eat these heather choices.

          I don’t think its always what kind of preteen we consume but how much.

          From Webmd.com:

          Most people get enough protein. But are you making the best protein choices, or are you in a rut?

          You need protein for your muscles, bones, and the rest of your body. Exactly how much you need changes with age:

          Babies need about 10 grams a day.
          School-age kids need 19-34 grams a day.
          Teenage boys need up to 52 grams a day.
          Teenage girls need 46 grams a day.
          Adult men need about 56 grams a day.
          Adult women need about 46 grams a day (71 grams, if pregnant or breastfeeding)

          http://www.webmd.com/food-recipes/protein

          ——————————–

          For instance, before I converted from my horrible booze laced, fast food, dairy/sugar drenched diet, I also drank sodas daily by the liter. After the conversion, I switched to water. And my preteen now comes mostly from a variety of nuts and seeds: almonds, cashews, Brazil nuts, filberts, walnuts, and pecans, and from the research I’ve read the fats in these nuts are healthier for our bodies than the fats from animal sources. After all, our brain is about 70% fat. This means we feed our body fat because it needs fat just like it need preteen and sugars but for health reasons its a good idea to not overdue it.

          Reply

  8. I believe people should eat what they believe is best for their bodies. I’m not a vegetarian, but I avoid red meat as much as possible.I have met obnoxious vegetarians. One used to come into the bookstore where I worked in Westwood years ago and everyday she would single out whomever was at the counter and ask them if they eat meat. If they said “Yes” she would harangue them and try to get them in a long argument. Admittedly, this woman was probably borderline mentally ill, and the other vegetarians I know are mostly Seventh Day Adventists and although they share their recipe suggestions with me and serve delicious vegetarian food, they don’t try to make me feel guilty because I still eat meat. I respect everyone’s right to eat as they see fit. One of my favorite foods is veggie pizza, but I do like real cheese on it. I also love salads make with as many ingredients as I have in the house.

    Reply

    • Hi Barbara!

      Thanks for the comment. That person who used to pick fights definitely seems like they were maybe nerodivergent in some way. That doesn’t really excuse treating people badly, but it would at least help to understand why she was acting that way, maybe.

      Ultimately, there are obnoxious or rude people of all kinds who make all types of dietary choices. I can understand why some vegetarians and vegans might feel tempted to actively promote their dietary choice and try to sway others to join them. They’ve made this choice, which is personal, for reasons that are ethically very important to them. That said, there are positive ways to do that and not so positive ways.

      I’m hesitant to make this comparison because it might open a line of conversation I don’t mean to, but you kind of alluded to it in your post and it may help clarify what I mean. It’s like when someone is very religious. There are many ways they could share their faith that are polite and positive and then there are ways that are abrasive, rude, and make others uncomfortable. So, if it would be easy to draw a comparison to the Westboro Baptist Church, then maybe that vegan should reconsider their tactics a little. However, if they’re more like your Seventh Day Adventist friends, sharing tasty recipes and their food with you (without judgement), I think that’s on the right track!

      Thanks again. I really appreciate your comment and I love veggie pizza too!

      Reply

  9. I may not be able to keep up replying to everyone’s comments, so I just want to post this one quickly to say thank you to everyone who reads this post and shares their experience! Thank you thank you thank you!

    Reply

  10. I’m not a vegetarian myself, but this article was a very interesting read. It’s true that food serves as an important factor in one’s identity. I never feel more Cuban than when I’m eating black beans, white rice, pork, and platanos. It’s additionally true that food can bring people together. One of my favorite Disneyland memories is of about nine of my friends and I sitting on the ground, in the dark, in New Orleans Square, all enjoying clam chowder bread bowls.
    Also, pizza is fantastic.

    Reply

    • Pizza is fantastic. So is clam chowder!! It’s definitely one of the few meaty foods that I really miss. Like you were saying about your Cuban favorites, I always felt like a true Rhode Islander when I was back home, eating a big bowl of chowder with crackers and bread.

      Thanks for the comment!

      Reply

  11. I loved reading your story about becoming a vegetarian I was once influenced to try it to by my favorite celebrity and I felt bad for the animals, I can definitely relate to what you felt from your mom, my parents were concerned for me too, I was only eating French fries and cheese and lettuce sandwiches they were worried about the protein that I wasn’t getting any although I did eat peanut butter I thought that would work. my mom and dad finally convinced me to eat meat again but there is still a big part of me that doesn’t care for it I would much rather eat a bowl of macaroni and cheese. or eat a bean and cheese burrito from taco bell I just don’t know how to eat vegetarian it probably would help with a lot of health issues that run in my family like diabetes and high blood pressure and heart disease. just don’t know how to cook, although I do love to eat bean tacos just refried beans and cheese on tortilla shell pretty good. was there any vegetarian foods that you just never really liked I remember my mom bought me boca burgers and I didn’t like them, not all vegetarian foods are good, although they are better for you? what is your all time favorite vegetarian food Chris?

    Reply

    • I’m sorry eating vegetarian didn’t really work out for you. It can take some time to adjust and you definitely have to take a little time in the beginning and think about how to best make sure you’re meeting all your nutritional needs.

      While protein is a part of it, people tend to be unnecessarily fixated on it. It’s always seemed odd to me that as long as you eat meat, not many people will bother you about your nutrition, but as soon as you stop, suddenly everyone wonders where you get your protein. Protein isn’t the only important nutrient. Sure, you may be sacrificing a little bit of protein intake when going veggie, but you are likely also opening yourself up to a higher intake of fiber and vitamins and minerals, like vitamins A, C, and K as well as potassium, calcium, iron, and magnesium from plant-based sources, which is the probably best way to get them.

      Anyway, I know that when I first went vegetarian, I wasn’t eating healthy at all. Thing is, I wasn’t eating healthy at that time in my life anyway, even when I was eating meat. Just for example, I probably went from eating ham and cheese sandwiches or burgers four to six times a week for lunch to eating grilled cheese or BLT without the B, so my nutrition wasn’t great… but it wasn’t exactly any worse. It may have even been a little better–I was definitely lowering my cholesterol. As I went, I tried more and more new foods and got healthier.

      I’m not sure what my favorite vegetarian food is. A lot of my favorites aren’t really unheard of. I like pasta and tomato sauce. I love tomato basil pizza. I really love avocados (and guacamole!), pao di quiejo (Brazilian cheese bread), and almost any Indian vegetable dish. If I had to pick just one specifically vegetarian favorite, I really like fried buffalo tempeh.

      Reply

  12. Hitler had a mustache so everyone who has a mustache is a Nazi. Hitler had a pet dog so all pet owners are Nazis. Hitler served in the trenches in WW1 so all WW1 combatants are Nazis. Hitler presumably worn underpants so everyone who wears underpants is a Nazi. Hitler had a girlfriend who he may or may not have married before the end, so every male with a girlfriend is a Nazi. And so on.

    There there is the other side of the coin. Many Buddhists were vegetarian long before Hitler was born so all Nazis were actually Buddhists.

    Reply

    • Great point(s), Ross. At the time, I was a little too flustered and upset to point out how flawed the guy’s point was. All I could think to say was, “Uh actually Hitler is pretty well documented as eating pheasant when dining with other world leaders before the War broke out.”

      Anyway, thanks so much for the comment!

      Reply

  13. My favorite vegetarian meal is spaghetti using spaghetti squash with a fruit salad for dessert!
    Thank you for writing this- loved it almost as much as I love living animals 😉

    Reply

  14. Hi Chris.
    Love your writing on vegan/vegetarians. When I decided to end my relationship with meat I was on a rampage. I was so upset with all the torture, testing and killing of innocence ????. I started writing companies and ranting about the things they were doing to test new products.
    Fast forward today and it still continues. However, I don’t eat meat. I was never a huge fan of meat growing up so my transition was easy. I believe deep inside my soul my emotions were very upset about killing animals for me to consume. I ????????????animals. After reading many articles on how they are tortured before going to be slaughtered “The Down Cow” was so heart wrenching I could barely finish reading through my sobbing. It’s all about profit. I know I’m not going to die from a vegan lifestyle as my mother had decided.
    The countless questions about what would I eat, how would I obtain nutrition and protein?????YIKES!!! One of my mothers favorite pokes is “you just eat seeds and lettuce.” I’m still very disappointed that she must make digs about my enjoyment when I cook. I love my veggies ????! Personally, I love salads, but I can rock tofu scramble, killer ginger bread and mock tuna salad. It’s awesome!!!!
    The BEST part is I never hurt one animal????
    Many have chosen to eat for compassion. We are the voice because these animals feel pain, cry, feel desperate, alone and our voice is to be for them????

    Reply

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