The Other Boleyn Girl: A Frustratingly Wrong Portrayal of Rape by @willvanstonejr

There’s a right way and a wrong way to write historical fiction. Remember the heaps of glory for Reign? That was a right way. This month is, annoyingly, about the wrong way. The oh-so-wrong-way it hurts my brain.

Dude! I got this great idea for a movie! First, we retell the story of Henry VIII and Anne Boleyn but from Mary Boleyn’s point of view. We totally ignore history, make shit up and *boom,* instant hit.

I dunno, man; I’m not sure there’s enough drama there to carry a whole film. I mean, sure; there’s adultery and deception and a clash with the most powerful entity in the known world [Catholicism], but it’s probably not enough.

Okay… but what if Henry rapes Anne… and she becomes pregnant with Elizabeth!?

Greenlight!

Yeah, so, this is what I imagine that pitch meeting must have gone like when The Other Boleyn Girl was first discussed. I’m guessing they all caught a nasty case of the stupids. After all, anyone with even a passing understanding of The Tudors will tell you Henry didn’t rape her. In fact, there’s zero doubt he waited and waited and waited for her to consent. He was many things, including a giant whore who couldn’t find a cod piece strong enough to keep his peen from zeroing in on the closet willing lady, but a rapist he was not.

So why in hell was that ridiculous scene included?

If you haven’t seen The Other Boleyn Girl, you’re lucky. But you also might be confused. See, in this horrible telling of history’s most scandalous divorce, Henry is madly in love with Mary and while she’s pregnant with his son (which history insists was a girl and probably not his but her husband’s, since her second kid was a boy but, you guessed it, most likely William Carey’s, too) is reacquainted with Anne who’d already been whored out to him by her uncle, but Henry had turned away from her blah blah blah bullshit that doesn’t matter.

Anyway, she says no nookie for cookie and he’s a goodish boy for a while, but after he reorganizes England’s religious standing and puts Catherine of Aragon out to pasture, he decides he’s earned some playtime and goes all Real Man^TM on her. Because the true story of history’s most infamous royal pair isn’t chock full of enough drama already. I guess.

Really? Rape just to up the ante?

Are you freaking kidding me, Hollywood? Has it become one of those things we just pull out of a hat when we need to pad a runtime now? You do realize there are other, better ways to titillate, right? Like, oh, I dunno, the consensual sex they had that led to Elizabeth being conceived? Could’ve made it uber hot (Natalie Portman + Eric Bana = oo la la) instead of uber-icky.

Oh, did you not realize Anne went for it after Catherine of Aragon was out of the picture and she and Henry were all but hitched? What, that not sexy enough for y’all?

Maybe, just maybe, Justin Chadwick, the dolt who fouled up as director, doesn’t understand the weight a rape scene carries – or, at least, should. We don’t have other violent crimes committed just for shits and giggles (except in horror, of course, but even that genre tends to keep it rape-free when rape would just be a random plot point and not a driving force in the narrative),so why does sexual assault get used so… casually?

Is this a chick-hater thing? Like, does Mr. Chadwick despise woman-folk? Does he have an unrealized rape fantasy he plays out in his films? Or does the fault lie with Peter Morgan (screenwriter) who, according to reviews of Henry VIII, has had the king lash out in similar ways back in 2003?

Maybe they’re both just naïve and don’t even realize what a horrible job they did.

Let’s fix that, shall we?

Rape is life altering. It’s not something that’s easily moved on from, if it ever is. Post attack, Anne is affected for, like, one scene. Then, she’s back to her scheming self. Dude, seriously. If you’re gonna hack up history, at least be realistic in the fallout and ask yourself, “would she really fall for her rapist?”

Well?

You want to write rape? You go on and write all the rape you want. No one’ll stop you. Hell, I’ll defend your right to do so. I have no issue with the rape scenes in many films. I even write them in my stories as well. But do not confuse sex with rape and do not inject rape into a love story. People don’t rape people they love; they rape people they wish to control and hurt and destroy. Henry never wanted to do any of that to Anne (until the whole beheading thing, of course); her strength was one of the things that attracted him.

And learn how to include the fucking historical part of historical fiction in your work. Also, learn how to actually do what you claim to do. Hacks.

Hmmm. Maybe this is where Game of Thrones got their idea from.

 

[blurbit]

Photos courtesy of pixabay and Wikipedia commons